20. "I couldn't sleep"

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Jill POV
the last few weeks have been really hard especially for Y/N. she's a lot in Olivia's room and her mental health is not the best. she's having panic attacks and she is still so sad about everything what happened and it breaks my heart to see her like that. so since Christmas and new year's is comming up I want to ask her to come to the Netherlands to my family with me. to meet my family. she's laying in my arms and we're watching Netflix when I decided to ask her. „Hey baby?" I said and kissed her head „hm?" „you know Christmas and New Years is comming soon and I want to ask you if you maybe wanna come with me to Oldenzaal?" she sat up and looked at me „ you want me to come with you to your hometown and to meet your family?" she ask and a smile appears on her face „yeah I mean if u want to" „ omg of course!!"
she says and I kissed her. „I missed your smile".

Y/N POV
it's our last training before the winter break.
„what are you guys doing over the holidays" Lisa asks us. Jill put her arm around me „ we're going to my family" she smiles at me and I kissed her. „okay guys take a room" Viv said and earned a slap from Lisa. „ahah visiting the family I see where this is going."

we're on the plane right now. „soooo talk me through your family and your hometown" „ I told you about that like a million times. you're nervous aren't
you?" she laughed  „no.. well maybe a little"
„hahah okay so there's my mom Chantal and my dad Rene, my big brother Davy his wife Danae and their twins Sarah and Hannah (A/N : I know they're not married and they don't have kids but I thought about Jill being a auntie and it's cute so there you go) and my little brother Boyd.
and Oldenzaal is beautiful especially to Christmas they're lights and the snow it's just beautiful"
„I can't wait.. I'm a bit scared what if they don't like me?" „don't be scared they'll love you I promise"

when we were there I directly loved it especially the snow. when you're growing up in Florida you don't get to see that much snow. „and you are Y/N
right?" Jill's mom asked me. I just nodded and said that it's so nice to meet her. then she hugged me. I could see that Jill smiled at us it was kinda cute...
After saying hello to everyone Jill and I went to her room to take a quick nap and then we went downstairs to eat.

we're eating when Jill's mom spoke up „ so Y/N tell us something about yourself" „well there's not a lot about me, I was born in Orlando and grew up there then I went to college then to Munich and then to London." „nice and what about your family?" she asked me and I froze. Jill is grabbing my hand „mom stop" „ why can't I ask her that?" Jill's mom said and then Jill looked at me "It's okay... uhm well my brother died my dad and grandpa also died and the rest of the family wants nothing to do with me... so I only had my sister but she hates me right now and is talking stuff about me on social media and well... my mom... she died a month ago.." I said with tears in my eyes. "I'm so sorry" Jill's mom said and grabbed my hand "it's okay uhm can I go to the bathroom real quick?"
"sure I'll show you where it is" Jill said got up and showed me where the bathroom is.

"are you okay?" she grabbed my hand. "I guess" "hey look at me, I'm so sorry okay my mom-" "hey it's okay she didn't knew and now go back to your family  I know how much you missed all of them especially you cute nieces I'm gonna be back in a minute"
I smiled at her " okay I'm proud of you and I love you" she kissed me and went back to her family.

I locked myself in the bathroom I felt a panic attack comming up so I decided to FaceTime Tobin. I'm really close with her since my first national team camp.

T= Tobin
Y= Y/N

T: hey kid what's going on?
Y: Tobin I need your help
T: what's wrong
Y: I told you that we're visiting Jill's family over the holidays right? I'm in Oldenzaal where Jill's family lives and we were eating and her mom asked me about my family and I told them and now I locked myself in the bathroom and I'm panicking
T: okay calm down everything is fine you're fine just breathe okay?  It's okay they're gonna love you even after what you told them. and if not you're gonna take the next flight to Portland and spend the holidays with Chris and me alright?
Y: okay
T: good and now go back and show them why to love you
Y: thanks tobs love you
T: love you too kid bye

(end of call)

after that I went back.

Jill POV
"is she okay?" Danae asked me " yea she just needs a minute" "I feel so bad" my mom looks at me "it's okay she's not mad or something" a few minutes later Y/N comes back. we finished eating, we talked a bit and then we went to sleep.

Y/N POV
I woke up and looked on my phone and saw that I only slept for an hour. I try to sleep again but it didn't worked so after a few hours laying awake in bed I decided to go downstairs and trink some water.
I'm standing in the kitchen drinking my water and looking out of the window when I heard someone coming downstairs. "hey honey" it's Jill's mom "hey" I smiled at her. "what are you doing down here why aren't you sleeping?" "I couldn't sleep" "I'm really sorry about what I asked at the dinner...I shouldn't have asked that" Chantal looked at me. I grabbed her hand "it's okay you couldn't have known I'm just a bit scared that you all are now gonna treat me different and I don't wanna destroy something with you guys because I love your daughter I really love her and I know how much you all mean to her and it's the first time I met you guys and -" "oh honey you're not going to destroy something with us we can tell how much Jill loves you and how much you love her and you make her happy.. I have never seen my daughter that happy and we all love you already and I don't want and can't replace your mom but if you ever want to talk someone or need someone like a mom you can always call me okay? you're a part of the family now" she says and gives me a big hug. "thank you" "thank you for making Jill happy" she smiles at me.
"hey" I turned around and saw Jill standing there. "you're awake?"I asked her "it was a bit cold in my bed" she said and hugged me from behind, put her head on my shoulder and looked at her mom. "sorry couldn't sleep anymore" "it's okay" she kissed my head.
I closed my eyes and leaned against her. "go to sleep we have a lot to do today" her mom said. we went upstairs and went to bed. Jill put her arms around me and I fell asleep.

Jill POV
I felt cold air which caused me to wake up. I heard talking downstairs so I also went downstairs. I heard my mom and Y/N talking. I'm so lucky to have Y/N.
and after what I heard my mom already loves her.I went into the kitchen and then my mom sent us to bed. we laid down in bed and I put my arms around her. she cuddled into my side and after a while I felt her breathing getting heavier.

God I love her so damn much.

____________________________________
hey guys !!  hope you're all okay! sorry for not updating 🥴 I hope you like this chapter...
also I changed a bit in the first chapter
"what you need to know"
see ya :)

𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 || Jill Roord lovestoryWhere stories live. Discover now