Your Big Break

twenty eight

"last week of tour." Tom mumbled, kissing my cheek through the morning tiredness. I smiled and let the sun shine on my face to warm me up. The hotel bed was a welcome break from the tiny cramped bunks, and actually being able to enjoy it without someone waking us up was even better. He didn't seem too pleased with the sun though and scrunched his face up when he opening his eyes, making me laugh
"It's nice and warm baby. Plus, it means I can see your face." He smiled but still refused to open his eyes "I wanna see your pretty eyes."
"Stop acting all soft you know it makes me melt." He groaned "Have we got a free day today?" He moved so he was cuddled into my neck
"Think so baby. Unless the boys find something for us to do." He sighed
"Can't I just stay here with you?"
"And do what exactly?"
"Cuddle." He started softly kissing my neck but not like he did when he wanted something more. They were soft light kisses, ones he did when he was tired or simply wanted to show affection. Little sneaky kisses on the bunks or the sofa whilst we were tangled up in a hug
"Is Gavin coming to my last show? He's acting all weird whenever I bring it up to him."
"I don't know. I asked for you because I saw it stressing you out. He was being all weird with me too." He didn't return to kissing my neck after that and I was kind of happy he didn't because it was just making me sleepy "Wanna do something today?"
"Thought you wanted to stay and cuddle."
"I do. But if I ask you then you can't say I didn't." I chuckled "We didn't make any plans today did we?"
"No. Made sure we didn't remember? Cus you said you wanted me all to yourself for the day."
"Yeah and Dom thought it was to have sex with you." Tom mumbled, the smile evident in his voice as he began to remember
"That's not on the table?" I asked in fake shock
"I mean. If you want to." He said, kissing my neck again but just as soft as before, nothing more "If you want me to just ask." He started kissing a little rougher knowing damn well I always found it awkward to ask
"Tom stop." I whined "You know I don't ask. Quit being mean to me about it"
"Really? Cus you beg quite a fucking lot." He stopped kissing and instead rested with his lips pressed to my skin
"One time. One time and you were teasing me all night right in front of the boys."
"Why you mad? You want them to join us?" He was laughing now and the small intense conversation subsided into a jokey one.
"Shut up tom." I said, shoving him away but laughing just as much
"Do you wanna do something proper today? Like a nice date. I don't know round here much though. But I'm sure we could find somewhere nice."
"Yeah. I'd fucking love that."
"Awe really?" He looked up at me with wide eyes "I love it when you talk like that. Makes me feel special."
"Soft arse." I mumbled, kissing his head soon after to show it wasn't in any mean way "Let's get a coffee."
"Okay. And then we could watch a movie?"
"Yeah sure."

I was looking out of the window when I saw him in the reflection. He was smiling to himself as he watched me,having approached the table a few minutes before, and I didn't want to let on I'd seen. Not yet. I watched the people on the street walk past but couldn't help but notice him taking a candid shot on his phone
"Pretty girl." He marvelled, sitting down facing me and resting his head on the window to get a better look "I love when you're so innocent like that. It's sweet."
"I am not innocent." I protested, taking my frappe before he could try and taunt me with it in response. He sat up and took a sip of his coffee, smirking.
"I know." I rolled my eyes and kicked him lightly under the table "But seriously. Those little moments they're just so...pure. I love that." I smiled and held my hand out across the table for him to hold. He held it gently in his and stroked his thumb over my knuckles making me practically fucking melt "I don't think it's possible for me to love you anymore."
"Nope. I love being with you. It's like the first proper time I've felt love." He was watching intently, listening to ever word I was saying and taking it in "I love you Tommy."
"Love you too Luce. Always."
"Can we go back to the hotel after this. Just wanna cuddle."
"Cuddle?" He smirked again making me retreat a little and take my hand away "Hey what's wrong?"
"I don't wanna do anything. Just cuddle."
"It's okay. I was only messing. I should've made sure I was clear on what you wanted." It wasn't new, the speech that is. In fact it had happened quite a few times. But I found it so sweet how he felt he needed to explain it so softly every time to reassure me. The emphasise that he wasn't who Jason was. I let out a small sigh and smiled "I know I need to stop saying that but-"
"No. You're making sure I'm safe and happy. Never stop." He smiled and I let him hold my hand again "Let's finish these and then we can go."

"I'm getting deja vu." I remarked, stroking his face where the sunlight was hitting it
"I'm getting sleepy." I giggled at him and he seemingly found it quite cute as he opened his eyes to look at me. He smiled when he saw my face but it soon fell "Dom texted me on the way back. He wants to do a little shoot for the next album."
"Okay. I'll stay here and sleep."
"No baba. I want you there and so does he."
"Is jesse going to be there?" Although it'd been made very clear I wasn't interested in dom she still had some kind of issue with me. She also made it purposefully very clear. Tom sighed making me think I'd disappointed him in some sense, so I pulled away and rolled over "M'sorry" I mumbled
"Sweet girl it's okay. Can I come cuddle you?"
"Why are you asking?"
"I always ask when you retreat like that. I know it's the past creeping up. Wouldn't want to make it worse." He wasn't exactly wrong about it being my past, but I was baffled at how he'd picked up that something so small was a result of it. And I'd somehow stupidly missed that small detail; he always asked.
"I don't deserve you."
"You're right. You deserve me and so much more. Please can I come cuddle you."
"Oh fuck. I forgot to answer you're question. Of course you can." I turned over and kissed his nose, making him smile "I'll come. As long as you get some good pics of me too."
"Promise I will. Wanna get an outfit together? Some proper promo pics."
"No. Just nice pictures of me. In my normal clothes." He nodded and tucked me under his chin to hold me just a little closer "What's your photography limits?" I teased, jokingly insinuating something naughty
"If you're asking if I'll take a picture of you naked that's not going anywhere near my memory card." I giggled since he clearly got the joke from his tone of voice "Plus why would I take pictures when I get to see you with my own eyes."
"For when you're out."
"Hmm, I'll consider it next time we're apart." He teased, trying his hardest to hold back a laugh. His attempt was futile as a quick snicker from me led him to start laughing for real "We're so fucking weird."
"I know. But I love that humour." He chuckled softly "Do you wanna help me pick something to wear? I think it'll be fin getting all dressed up."
"Sure. I'll be your personal stylist."
"How long before dom wants to meet up?"
"About two hours. Come on pick a few outfits out and we can decide where we are gonna go."

If I'm being honest I struggled with this. I added bits and took bits away but I needed to put out something. This is a filler chapter but I promise some kind of storyline is coming. I'm sorry for sucking at updating but I don't like putting something out I'm not happy with, if I wouldn't read it I wouldn't put it out for you guys