Your Big Break

thirty one

I tapped my keycard on the lock and prayed that the beep wouldn't disturb tom. I heard the TV on loud and as I walked further in the small corridor i overheard him. He was snifflng and then I heard him start talking
"Yeah I know that dom. But she said it wasn't real. It is fucking real I swear. She just thinks she has to please me always and she's so fucking exhausted from tour."
"I know mate." I was surprised to hear dom in the room, making me feel bad for listening in since he'd clearly invited him over specifically whilst I was gone "She just doesn't know how to love. And how can you blame her. Her last relationship was all about making him happy that she lost sight of her own self. She's trying."
"Well I feel like I'm losing her. Like I don't wanna try. She's about to move into my place and yet we're supposedly like strangers." I bit my lip since it broke my heart to hear he had doubts.

Tom's pov
"That's not what she meant tom. I'm not having you twisting those words no matter how emotional you are."
"She said it wasn't real. I just wanna hold her and she's fucked off with gavin. I just think that it's not gonna work. Maybe I need to let her work on herself because she clearly doesn't care about me"
"Tom mate you don't mean that."
"Maybe I do. Maybe I wanna leave her. Because she doesn't understand what I'm doing for her. And sometimes I don't think she even respects or appreciates it."

Lexis pov
I didn't want to stand around and hear him go on so I walked into the room in complete silence "Lucy baby you're early."
"You've got some cheek babying her. You know she probably heard what you said right."
"Shouldn't have been listening in." He mumbled, ignoring me whilst I was grabbing clothes to put together an outfit for the day after
"You're right. She shouldn't. But its still not right that you would've straight up lied if she hadn't heard what you'd said."
"You don't think It would've killed me to lie?"
"I think it would kill her to know you'd lied. When you finally decide to grow the fuck up and break it off like you clearly wanna do!" I started to panic since the argument was getting louder "She loves you and you know damn well how hard it is for her to show you that!"
"So I'm supposed to accept the fact that she's just a shit girlfriend!"
"Tom. I get that you're angry but she was never a shit girlfriend."
"Then why did she say it didn't feel real?" He argued back. Dom pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed before speaking very slowly
"Because her brain, which has been warped by her abusive ex boyfriend, doesn't think that relationships can be equal. So she bases her whole worth on how much she can please you and makes it seem like you're the priority so that she doesn't get hurt. Because that's what he did." The way he explained so calmly to tom scared me, because I knew he was angry at him but he wasn't showing it. Id picked my clothes and i instead stood in the corner of the room since i didnt want it to kick off with me not there "You're being a fucking dick because all it takes is a bit of understanding that she wasn't taught how to fucking love properly." Tom stayed silent and looked shamefully over at dom, the lecture somehow making a difference "You can choose to leave her. That's on you. But never make her seem like a problem because of something that she can't even control."
"I...I didn't. She said it felt fake."
"Because you guys hadn't had sex. That's why. And it doesn't take a genius to figure out how that connects to her past does it?"
"But you can't make me stay with her! Why are you trying to?"
"Seriously Tom just shut the fuck up. Lucy cmon. Youre staying with me."
"You can't just tell her what to do dom." Dom turned to me, a softer look on his face
"Lucy darling do you wanna come with me." I looked over at Tom then back to dom "You can choose. You don't have to stay here."
"I don't feel comfortable here tonight."
"Okay. You come stay in my room. Or with gav?"
"With you. Gav will only get angry at tom." Tom smiled "Dont know why you're so fucking happy. It's to help him not you." His expression was wiped again
"Lucy do you feel safe with me in there? Or do you want me to go stay with one of the others?"
"I wanna stay with you." He was talking down to me but in a different way than he was to tom. It was more of a caring way
"I'll take you." He got up off the bed "Is there anything you want to eat?"
"No. Ate with gavin. Had some pizza."
"Alright then." He walked over to me and offered his hand. I shook my head and he took it away, instead turning towards the door "Come on kid. Let him calm down."
"I don't wanna see him ever again."
"Come on kid." He repeated, gesturing towards the door "Let him calm down." I rolled my eyes and walked out past him, letting him have the honour of closing the door "Are you sure you want to come to my room?"
"Positive."
"Come on then. Let's go."

"Dom?" I said softly. He didn't respond and I looked over at him to notice he was sleeping. I knew it wasn't the best move but against my better judgement I got out of my own bed and laid down beside him, getting comfortable before closing my eyes
"Could've just asked." I jumped at his sudden words "Sorry sweetheart. You feeling unsettled hmm?" He opened his eyes to look over at me
"Yeah. I can go back I should have asked you and now-"
"Now what? If that's where you feel safe you can stay there."
"I feel safe with Tom too."
"You wanna go back?" I shook my head "You wanna stay there?"
"Can we go for a walk?"
"Kid cmon. You're just trying to distract yourself now. If you keep doing that you'll have to go sleep in your own bed." I shook my head quickly and rolled over so my back was to him "You alright?"
"Yep."
"You want me to stay away from you?"
"No." He chuckled
"Roll back over." He was on his side when I did so and he smiled softly "Wanna talk?"
"No."
"What do you want? I'm not going to judge you but you need to answer so I know how to help you."
"Won't jesse be mad? That I'm in the same bed as you?"
"She's over that now. She'd probably think its cute. Besides it's nothing weird you just need to feel safe, like how a child needs to feel safe yknow."
"Sometimes it helps to be a child. Cus then it's everyone else's thing to deal with. Kinda like a cop out."
"I know. I do the same. But if that's how you settle m'gonna need you to do it right now okay?"
"Can we go see Tom in the morning?"
"You can. And I'll wait outside the door."
"Thanks dom. Love ya."
"Please stay in touch after we get back. Would hate to lose you. You've kinda become like part of the family." I smiled and closed my eyes, hearing the little sigh of relief he let out since he'd figured out what comforted me the most. I also knew it would come back to bite me when he wanted me to do something.
"Thought I'd never find another family. I think I have now."
"Goodnight Lucy." He said softly
"Night dom." He chuckled and gently kissed my forehead
"Goodnight Lucy." He emphasised
"Alright. I get it. I'm going to sleep now."
"Better be."
"Rude" he chuckled making me giggle in response
"Cmon now. Gotta get your beauty sleep so you can see tom tomorrow."
"Okay."
"So night Lucy." The way he was kinda getting annoyed with me made me giggle but I had to admit I was tired
"Night dom." I said sleepily "See you in the morning."
"You too luce. You too."