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6 weeks have passed and in the 6 weeks 2 race weekends had passed, Portugal and Spain and now it was time for the Monaco race weekend. One of my favourites on the calendar. But I'm just looking forward to next weekend for two reasons. 1. it's mine and Phi's 21st birthday and 2. it's the UEFA Champions League final and I'm playing and I can't wait. 

Yesterday was media day and it was the worse one I have had in my racing career. All the questions we mainly directed at me and it was painful to hear them. I literally felt like sinking down so low in my seat and putting my fingers on my ears so I didn't have to listen to what was being said but I acted professionally. There were moments where I wanted to completely breakdown, but I was lucky that I had the support of Antonio Giovinazzi. 

After the press conference and my other media duties, I went to hospitality and up to my driver's room and spend a couple of hours on the phone with Phil and I told him what happened in the press conference and he couldn't believe what he was hearing. But it didn't end there. Over night the amount of hate comments that I was getting on Instagram and through DM's, kind of blew my confidence for the entire weekend.

Both practice sessions on the Friday, I was in the bottom 10 and I wasn't happy, it made me doubt myself a little bit. It really put a downer on my outlook for this weekend. Looking over the data for FP1 and FP2, I saw that there was a bigger margin between myself and my teammate and that his performance in the car was a lot stronger than mine and it upset me. But the practice session on Saturday morning wasn't any better. Still in the bottom 10, was just knocking my confidence even more and for a fact, I know that it will affect my performance in qualifying.

It's now about an hour before qualifying starts and I'm sitting in the garage, looking at my data from the FP1, 2 and 3, to see what I can do to help myself in qualifying, but as Tom is talking to me, I'm not really paying attention because I just want to get the qualifying out the way, so I can just go back to the hotel and curl up in bed. I was meant to be going to the Amber Lounge show tonight but honestly with my disaster of a weekend so far, I'm just not up for it. Scrolling through the last page of data, I feel an arm wrap around my waist and I turn to see Lando smiling at me with his usual grin. 

"Hey, you alright, you seem a bit distance ?" Lando asked with concern 

"I'm fine," I said abruptly 

Lando looks at his clearly not alright girlfriend and starts to worry

"Babe you're clearly upset about something, so please tell me what's wrong?" Lando insisted 

"I said I was fine Lando. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to get ready" I said in an agitated tone before walking over to the shelf to grab my earpieces, balaclava and helmet, HANS device and Gloves before jumping into the car, getting comfy and then being stepped in by one of my other engineers. This was the first time in ever that she has done her handshake with Lando, hugged him and told him that she loved him. 

Tom: Radio check for me Jas 

Jas: Let's just get this session over with, so I can go back to the hotel and go to sleep 

Tom: Just focus Jas. 30 seconds to clearance 

When I saw the mechanic walking backwards in front of my car, I knew he was giving me clearance to leave the garage to head out to the track. Once I'm out of the pit lane, I can literally put my foot to the floor and get some real pace out of the car and hope that I can pull something out my backside to get into Q2 and Q3. 

Q1 was pretty uneventful. I managed to pull off a decent lap and I managed to place P11 on that. In my head, I was like I'm close to the top 10 but I've got to get past P10 during Q2 to have a chance of getting into Q3 and being in the top 10. Q2 was a complete nightmare in my eyes. The pace in the car was a lot slower than Lando's. I was struggling to get around corners, especially the hairpin. I was just approaching the start-finish line to then hear a voice in my ears.