Blues (Ryeji)

Grey

YEJI's POV

Words enter from one ear and exits at the other. His words, I've heard it over and over for the past years and yet nothing changed. I followed everything but still gets worst.

"Just trust the process and don't forget to take you medicines", I sighed when he said that, the same time I said it in my mind.

I'm seated here at his office's couch while mom was talking to him. I don't want to listen anymore, I'm tired and just want to leave this suffocating room. I plugged my earphone and filled my mind with music that matches the gloomy day.

'Even the day sympathizes with how I feel'. I chuckled at the thought and just stared at the forming clouds outside the window. Few moments it was clear, the sky is blue and now I could only see grey.

Then I saw my mom stand up followed by him, she bowed and said what I presume as thank you. I removed my earphone and walked to my mom.

"Thank you" I said and smiled at him tightly and tugged the hem my mother's coat. "I'll go", I said but she held my hand and bowed again at him before we leave his office.

"Are you okay?" She asked me and I gave her the purest smile I can form. "Yes mom, I'm just kind of tired and I still have pending school works in mind". I tried to shrug and be natural, I really tried.

She hugged me and patted my head down to my back. "Everything will be okay sweety" I sighed and first to broke the hug. "I hope so Mom", I held her hand so tight and lead the way out the building.

It was still raining so hard when we reached the entrance and we don't have our umbrella. "Wait here, I'll just get the car" my mom said before dashing her way out to the parking lot.

While waiting, I raised my hand to feel the rain. The raindrops never stopped and I didn't noticed my tears rolled down my face. I stopped what I'm doing, drying my hands by patting my jeans, and wore hoodie on my head to cover myself. I still have a lot of things in mind and I need time to think. I don't want to burden my family when I got home. I want to be alone for the meantime.

I brought my phone out and start to type a message to my mother.

'Mom I can't wait you anymore, I have to go somewhere and it's urgent. I'll be home later. Love you.'

I texted her and didn't wait for any response. I plugged in my earphone and started to walk in the rain, not minding anything.

I slowly got drenched by the rain and I enjoyed it. 'I don't just feel cold inside, but also outside', I thought and continued walking until my phone rang, it's mom, I know.

I answered it and tried my best to sound fine. "Hey mom, what is it?" I said.

'Sweety where are you? Did you bought an umbrella? You'll get sick.' she said and I smiled. "Mom I'm fine I promise, I won't get sick I promise and I'll be home after I finish something", Mom is just so worried I know, but I also need my time alone.

"Mom I need to go, my mates were calling me" I said and dropped the call and hid my phone, music resumes to play. I continued walking while thinking where should I go when my phone went silent, there's nothing that plays.

I brought out my phone and noticed that my playlist ended. I tried to find songs that fits my mood while still walking when I heard noises, loud honks to be specific.

I didn't noticed that I'm here in this situation, in the middle of the road, with my messed up mind. 'I thought I still have few years but I guess not', this is the thing that came into my mind when I froze in my stance, witnessing how the truck gets closer and I accepted my destiny.

I closed my eyes and hold my phone tightly, unintentionally playing a song.

'The thick color of a rainy day in Seoul
The racing cars
The squirming umbrellas all over the place
It's cloudy and the air is clear

The rain stops and the reflection in the puddle
With a light gray background
Why am I standing here?
I don't know if I have a lot of thoughts or no thoughts at all'

This song speaks for my current situation. The noise increases and I held by breath, this is it.

I waited for minutes but instead of being hit by a truck, ending up surely dead. I was pulled, dragged and held tightly by a warm body against my cold one.

Tear dropped but I breath out the air I was unconsciously holding for long. I looked and 'who is this person?' I thought.

I was about to speak when this person firmly held my arms and distanced our bodies. "Are you dumb?!?! Can't you see? Hear?........." That person said and I couldn't properly hear the rest as that person spits it out full of rage and anger.

After saying everything, that person massaged her forehead and picked up an umbrella, took a hold of my hand for me to hold the umbrella and said "Don't be dumb and be mindful next time" then that person run away as if on a rush.

I stared at the fading figure of that person and 'wait I didn't brought any umbrella with me right?' I realized and look at what I'm holding, coming back on my senses.

I smiled and whispered "thank you" while shading my drenched clothes with an umbrella.

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Hellooo Chinggus, this is my first time writing and I hope you understand the wrong grammars and errors. I hope you'll enjoy this story and I also hope for myself to deliver and convey the emotion that I want to deliver.

Thank you for reading. Please kindly comment your thoughts and vote. Love you!!!!.