I seized the bottle
Eyeing its contents.
One more won't hurt.
Ohh but yes it will, darling.
One turns into two.
two turns into the bottle.
It's what always happens.
Uncaring of the harm
it would bring,
I gave in,
Desperate for the euphoria
it would bring.
After all, what harm
can it really do? my mind argued.
Before I knew it,
The bottle was empty,
It's contents
already in my system.
How the numbness takes over,
Raking over my body,
It's familiar hands,
Wrapping around my limbs.
My thoughts and visions blurred
As well as my emotions,
Becoming less and less clear.
I guess that's what I love about it;
The momentary absence
Of my rapidly growing problems.
Freedom from reality.
It's not healthy.
I'm aware,
But I guess I never learned my lesson
Til the effect wore off;
When my body became so familiar
That it refused to numb me any more,
Having no effect whatsoever.
That's when I knew
I would do anything to
Get that feeling back,
The feeling of utter numbness,
As if my body
were submerged under water,
Blurring the sounds and images,
As well as the hurt I tried to avoid.
It scared me.
I became afraid of my own self,
Of the measures I would take
To get one more. Just one.
One more pill. One more bottle.
That's when I knew I had to quit.
Authors note: this poem is very personal, so please read my words with an open mind instead of disdain or disgust. I am human. I make mistakes, and obviously this was one that I'm not proud of. But I thought that if I wrote a poem about it, it would give me a little piece of mind about it.
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Hidden Thoughts
PoetryJust a bunch of little poems that I've written. Hope you like them, and are able to be comforted by some of them, or atleast be able to relate. And just something that I want to let you know is that I tend to write when I am in low spirits, it was j...
