What am I without you

chapter 16

scott

it was avi's turn to perform and he kept on saying no, until I dragged him on stage and brought him the mic. I quickly went off stage and waited for him to sing or do anything talented. but he just stood there with a blank look on his face.

"ermm... scott... I don't think he is taking it too well... I don't think we should force him." kirstie warned.

"im starting to agree.... hey kevin.. can we let him off for now" I whispered

"hmm... I guess." he agreed. " okay avi, you needn't do anything. its fine"

he snapped back to reality and looked at me before quickly getting off the stage. ii began to walk towards him but he pushed me out of the way and ran out of the theatre room.

"oh no..."

"I think you should go scott" kirstie said. I nodded my head and quickly followed behind him. he ran out of the building and behind the school. I caught up to him and stopped him.

"why would you make me do that!" he pushed me away from him

"I thought it would be fun!"

"you mean funny! to watch and to laugh. right!"

"no, no! I just thought it would be fun for us to hang out whether you cant sing or not. get your mind off things. I'm sorry if I took it too far. but what was the problem"

"the problem is I don't do well with stages or performing. I have problems with lots of things but you don't seem to care about them. why? because everything has to go your way."

" I just don't get it, I try to do things to make you happy but instead it does the opposite. why don't you just tell me what you want. I will do exactly that."

"how about you go and have fun with your new friends and let them take you around in school and leave me alone. at least do me that favour since im living with you anyway."

"but I want to hang out with you, I want  to be friends with you. I don't need them, but I do need you. why don't you get that. I care about you."

"why?! why do you care so much. why cant you just leave me alone. I've cause you so many problems yet you still keep coming back."

"how can you be so ignorant!" I shout but quickly calm myself down when I noticed I startled him. I place my hand on his shoulders cautiously. "you haven't caused me any problems. it was kirstie's friends that did. or your father."

"but it was all because of me." he whispered.

"no it was all because I cared about you. if I hadn't of bothered about you when you were hurt and gotten your things from your house knowing how your father is I wouldn't have gotten hurt by him. I can go through many more troubles like that, just to know you are okay." he looked at me as if he didn't know what to say.

"I-I need s-some time alone." I began to protest. but he interrupted me "please. i'll see you later." I hesitated at first.

"if you need anything... you know where to find me." he nodded blankly and went to sit on the bench and I leave.

avi

I needed this time alone to comprehend what he had just said. he couldn't possibly mean everything he had just said. he.. cares... you see since I have never had anyone care for me in such a long time. I have forgotten how it feels. I guess I just don't know how to react to it now that I am receiving it. I got up and left a bit early.

I went to a nearby park and walked around, deep in my thoughts. last time someone cared for me was my mom. but its been so long since I've seen her that I have forgotten how she looks like. she's dead anyways...

the main question is why would someone care so much for a stranger, I get it if you are related to the person and you love them but a stranger... unless... no... he doesn't, he wouldn't, he couldn't... does he?

well if I care for him too does that mean I... the way he doesn't me to get hurt I don't want him to get hurt. it was strangely difficult for me to be rude to him that day in the hospital. do I...

maybe it wouldn't hurt to try... I guess... no one would need to know... no..no I couldn't... its getting late I should leave.

scott 

 I leave scott with kirstie and on the way home I accidently bump into this lady and drop all her stuff.

"shit, im so sorry" I say picking up her things.

"its fine kiddo" she replies, her voice was very soothing. "whats your name"

"scott hoying. and sorry again for the trouble I've caused, miss..."

" Shelly Kaplan. im new in the neighbourhood. well not exactly I've lived here before but circumstances forced me to move, but im back."

"c-can I ask you a question..."

"sure.."

"do you have any children"

"I do... but I don't know where he is to be honest. I haven't seen him in a long... long time. his name is avriel, he is actually the main reason I am here... do you happen to know him."

"if you are not busy I need you to come with me."

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IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY YESTERDAY april 19th. im 15 now. whoop, im sad that I didn't get a bday wish by a member of ptx but it doesn't matter. im going to see them in 9 days im so scared and excited. anyways have a nice week I guess. x