What am I without you

chapter 18

scott

its been a whole week since I have seen avi, I have sat on the same bench every morning, break and lunch hoping he would show up but every single time he doesn't. it makes me upset yet worried at the same time. he could be sick or... my heart sunk at the horrible thought that just came to mind. I was about to get up and leave when I saw avi walking into school. I sighed when I saw that he was okay. I quickly got up and ran over to him and stopped him.

"avi! are you alright, why weren't you in school" I asked him. he looked up at me before continuing to walk on. I caught up to him. "are you still upset with me?" he still continued to walk ignoring my question. "avi-"

"excuse me, I would much appreciate it if you stopped talking to me and leave me alone" he said without looking at me.

"avi, please talk to me. whats the matter"

"nothing's wrong. I just don't want to talk at the moment and I want to be left alone. is that difficult for you to comprehend." he took my hand of his arm and walked off to his class. I turned around and kirstie was standing right behind me which startled me. 

"is something wrong between you two?" she asked

"well, he is upset with me. but im not sure exactly what about..." I explained

"then what are you doing here, go talk to him!"

"no I think I should give him some space now."

"whatever, I still think you should go talk to him and sort things out now than later"

"fine, I will, but not now. a bit later"

avi

this whole week I stayed at home, not wanting to face scott. I don't know why I didn't have the courage to face him. its not like I should care about what he has to say about me. so I get up and get ready for school. I have to admit I was a bit nervous because I knew he was going to ask me loads of questions that im not sure I have the answer to.

...

I walk into school and I immediately spot him sitting on a bench. he glances up at me and I continue to walk ahead of him. he stops me but I tell him to leave me alone and I continue to walk off this time he doesn't follow me. that was way easier than I thought it would be to be honest. usually he wouldn't stop asking me until I gave him an answer.

at break he comes up to me and doesn't say anything, he just walked with me. he suddenly grabs my hand when no one was watching me and pulls me to a corner away from sight.

"we need to talk" he whispers and corners me. my breathing hitches by his sudden gesture. his eyes were locked onto mine before I quickly glanced away. I make it obvious that I was feeling uncomfortable and he registers it and moves backward only slightly. I put my hands in my pocket waiting for him to say something.

"well... why are you upset" he asks, his ocean blue eyes, staring intently into mine. it was as if I spaced out because he was snapping his fingers in my face. "avi? you gonna tell me?"

"there is nothing to tell."

"so you aren't upset with me?" he questioned cautiously. I avoided his question and looked at the wall beside me and I could've sworn I had seen a spider hiding in a crack. which freaked me out slightly. I heard scott sigh and slap his sides in annoyance. "okay fine. clearly I did something wrong, which I don't know by the way. it would've helped if you told me. but I don't think im getting an answer any time soon. so what do I do then. I don't like it when you ignore me and I don't enjoy not talking to you"

"maybe you should've thought about that when you told me to leave the house and stay with my mom" I blurted in sudden anger. I should've stayed at home.

"is that what this is about. me telling you to stay with your mom. I thought it would be better since you didn't like staying with me. plus she is your mom."

"what if I wanted to stay at your house." I stated, regretting it immediately. it looked like he was taken aback by what I had just said.

"what do you mean." he questioned. taking a small step closer. if there wasn't any space between us already. I felt his warm breath on my cheeks which made me even more aware of his body and how close he was.

"n-nothing. nevermind"

"no, tell me." he demanded.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore." I turned to leave and just as I was walking away he called me.

"by the way, you left your notebook" as relieved as I felt when he said he had my notebook it didn't make me feel completely content. I turned around to meet his body inches away from me.

"there are some things I can live without. like this book for example. but there are some things I want to live with..." what the heck am I saying.

"like..." I quickly grabbed my book, even though I had just said I didn't need it and walked off, before I could get far I feel a hand grab mine and pull me back. "like what avriel..." he whispered into my neck.

"like..." I almost spill, melting into his touch. "..no, n-nothing." I say wiggling out of his hold. "im sorry, I-I thought I could do this, but I cant."

"do what?" he steps closer and I take steps away

"im sorry" was all I said before I ran off.

scott

I was unsure of whether to be confused or happy. I didn't quite understand what he was trying to tell me but then at the same time I couldn't help but smile knowing that when he said there was some things he wants to live with, he meant me. but then again what couldn't he do.

I have to speak to him.

.

.

.

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee whooooooo.

hope you guys are having a good day. peace.