treinta | always

920 27 11
                                    

Dawn | always

It's like my heart was having premature ventricular contractions. I'm tachycardic and tachypnic, my vitals suggest a deviation from normal but my caudate nucleus is full of dopamine. The only thing between me and Alex is a 10-meter gap from where I'm standing and where he's parked.

We walked towards each other, I'm taking 2 strides with his every step. When he finally reached me, he says, "You look like shit."

"Wow, okay, tell me something I don't know," I lightly slapped him on the arm, resisting the urge to grab a latex glove from the nurse's station to slap him on the face 18th century style.

He takes my bag from me and slung it across his shoulder and we walked side by side towards his car. It was a quiet semi-stroll, none of us wanting to say a word or to address what we were thinking about. It wasn't tense, it wasn't suffocating, it was just different — like we had so much to say but don't know where and how to begin. It's been 3 days since I sent that message, in my defense, during that time, I didn't know I would be working this long.

We were looking into a possible murder case because the modus operandi was the same, like a signature move of some sort —the suspect always leaves behind a pentagram symbol in spray paint at the crime scenes, stating his claim on these murders.

We sat in pregnant silence, just staring at the windshield then to our fidgeting fingers. How do I even begin?

"Al—"

"Daw—"

"You go first," I tell him.

"No, you go first. It was you who wanted to meet up," he responds.

He was right and he had to wait 3 days, too, so I'm going to tell him why I suddenly wanted to see him, of course not before I take a deep, calming breath. "Alex," I stared at my lap, locking and unlocking the fasten on my watch, "I like you too."

I watched as the fear in his face is washed away, he seemed surprised at first but his eyes soften as he loosened his grip on the steering wheel. "Do you know I scared I was? I was overthinking every fucking minute, I had to put editing my DGT video on-hold. I thought you were going to say you won't talk to me anymore."

"Yeah, that wasn't one of my smartest decisions," I tell him honestly. It didn't occur to me that I might take long working at SFS. I actually thought I'd be able to talk to him in the morning, guess I was wrong. "I got too excited and sent you a message right away. Maybe I should've sent one when my shift was over."

"You think?" He had an amused grin on his face.

"Well, I'm sor—" I got cut off midway when his hand suddenly wrapped around me from the drivers seat, "—ry." I chuckled and embraced him with just as much tightness, even stroking his naked mane.

When we separated, he knew exactly what was running in my head so he answered before I could even ask, "I guess I panicked when you said you'd meet me now because your shift was over, I ran out of the apartment and went straight here."

"At least you got to put on clothes," I stifled a laugh when I saw he had his jacket the wrong side out, "or tried to put them on properly."

He deadpanned at the stitches and seams but then shrugged, "Doesn't fuckin' matter, nothing's going to change my good mood today."

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