What's been missing

boiling point

violet

it had been weeks for the cold shoulder from the guys. especially namjoon. he seems angry all the time. i have seen him with other staff members and other members of the band and he is always polite and friendly. i don't know what it is about me that sets him off.

it started first thing this morning when he came down and breakfast wasn't done yet. he didn't say anything but huffed about and sat angrily on the couch until it was.

he smiled brightly at all the guys when they enter the kitchen. i give them their food and turn to walk away.

"aren't you going to eat violet?" jungkook asked.

i caught the look namjoon sent his way. i just looked back to jungkook and shook my head. "i'm good. not very hungry this morning."

"are you sure? you look like you have lost some weight. maybe you should eat anyway." he continued.

i blushed. i hadn't really been eating much of anything lately. i just didn't have an appetite anymore. maybe the stress was getting to me. i was always tense now.

"kook. she said she isn't hungry. let it go." namjoon said through gritted teeth.

i really don't know what his problem is. i barely contained the eye roll before heading back into my room. i left the door cracked. i could hear them talking.....about me.

"she really has lost weight." jungkook said.

"yeah. i've noticed too. she never relaxes. the last time i saw her relaxed was the day she was in the back yard." taehyung says.

"she has been professional like the rest of you should be. it's not our problem if she has lost weight. maybe she is on a diet or has been using the gym. she is not our concern." namjoon said.

their breakfast finished in silence. i refused to cry. i wouldn't let him hurt my feelings.

when i heard them leave the dining room, i took and deep breath and headed back out. i cleared the dishes but before finishing, i needed to go over today with them.

"today you guys have dance practice most of the day. when thats over, it will be around dinner time so you guys can just let me know what you want but then you have to go over the music video. filming starts tomorrow for it. if anything changes, i will let you know. we leave in 30."

i head back into the kitchen area and finish cleaning. i wipe down the counters and table and sweep the floor before running the swiffer over it.

i go to my room and grab my bag and make sure the laptop, tablet and everything else is there before heading to the door. i go out to the van and clean it out. there were snack wrappers and bottles or water and soda cans in the back. i don't think they are dirty on purpose. i think they are just in a hurry and lay them to the side and by the time, it's time to exit, they forget that its there. once it's all clean, i head back inside. i make sure to grab an extra charger for jungkook because he always forgets to charge is phone or gaming system and they go dead. i grab pens and notebooks for yoongi so that he has something to write on at all times.

i grab snacks for seokjin, jimin  and hoseok, a stuffed animal for taehyung to cuddle when his band mates want to be left alone, and a playlist of hip hop songs to listen to on the way there for namjoon.

we arrive at the studio and i make my way to my corner. i set up everything and realize i have a ton of emails to reply to. sejin and mr. bang asking how everything is going, the producer for the music video verifying that we will be there later, and many many more.

it's around lunch when one of the staff come up with everyone's order. today its fried chicken that everyone wants. i go ahead and place the order. it arrives and i go get it. on the way back up, i get a text from PDogg asking me to send namjoon his way when i get the chance. i make it to the conference room with the food when misoo comes up to me with questions about the outfits for the video. i place all the food out and bring out my tablet to show her what i have been sent. i talk for just a few minutes and when i go to leave the room to tell everyone that lunch is ready, namjoon is standing in the doorway.

i leave out of the other door and head to the dance studio to let them know to come eat. when i enter, namjoon is sitting at the table. when they are all seated i look at him.

"PDogg messaged me a little while ago and would like to see you when you have a chance." i say picking up my food.

"and you are just now deciding to tell me?! you've been in here giggling with your little friend instead of doing your job and relaying a message that could be important."

"he said there was no hurry. just whenever you got a chance. and i haven't been in here giggling with a friend. i have been working since i got up this morning." i say quietly.

"really? when i came in here, you were laughing with one of the stylists instead of doing what you were suppose to be doing."

i had had enough. "what is your problem? i have done nothing but work from day one. i do your laundry, i wash your dishes, i make sure you eat, i make sure you do everything that needs to be done. i am the first one up and the last one down. i make sure that i am out of your way after my work is done. what more do you want me to do?" i say slamming my plate back down on the counter.

"i want you to do your damn job. no laughing with friends when you should be working, no delaying messages, no napping in the backyard. yes, you wash our clothes and dishes and run through our schedule but that is your job. if you cant handle it or want to complain about it, then maybe you aren't cut out for it. maybe you should find something else." he said with a very red face.

"maybe i should. maybe i should talk to mr. bang and find someone else to be your assistant." i say quietly.

there is a gasp from someone but i don't look. i simply walk out the door and make my way to mr. bang's office.

i knock and he calls me in.

"whats wrong?" he asks when he sees my face.

"i'm sorry sir but i think maybe you should find someone else to be bts's assistant."

"did something happen? sejin and the staff said you have been doing a wonderful job."

"i just don't think that i am a good fit with them. maybe i'm not doing a good enough job." i say looking down.

"why don't you think on it and take the next few days off and relax. i have a little house just outside of town. why don't you go there and relax and think about it and we will talk on monday."

"what about the guys' schedule? there is so much that still has to be done." i say.

"sejin can handle it for a few days. don't worry about it. but violet, the way you just panicked about them and everything getting done, let's me know that you the right fit for this job. just go relax and destress yourself."

i sigh and nod.

i make my way home and pack a bag. i don't leave a note or anything. i make sure i have everything and directions to the house before heading out and getting in my car.