throwing rocks at your window // Topper Thornton

nine

being heartbroken is so last year

"You made it!" Sarah threw her arms around me and squeezed me tightly.

I gave her a half hearted pat on the back and rolled my eyes.

She let go of me and then turned to make her way inside, "I feel like we haven't hung out in forever! I've missed you so much."

I followed her inside. I couldn't help but feel anger as she rattled on and on. She stopped being my friend before I left for college. She hasn't spoken to me in over a year and now, because I have the boy that she keeps on the back burner, she wants to be back in my life.

Sarah sat on her bed and patted the spot across from her, "Sit! I wanna hear all about you and Topper."

She had no shame, she just wanted to get right into it. I gave her an overly fake smile and tucked my hair behind my ear, "I don't even know where to begin! He is so, so great. He's sweet and caring. He listens! What boy does that?" I placed my hand on hers and gave her a wink, "Not to mention that dick game, right?"

I could tell she was annoyed. Her whole body tensed and she gave me a sarcastic smile, "That's good to hear. So happy for you guys."

I picked up her hand and admired her promise ring, "I'm so happy for you! You guys seem so cute together. And a promise ring? You're a lucky, lucky girl."

Sarah snatched her hand away from me, "Yeah, really lucky."

Sarah got up from the bed and made her way to her bedroom door, "We have the whole house to ourselves. What do you say we make some brownies and then eat them in the hot tub with some wine?"

I felt a small smile cross my lips. Maybe she did want to be my friend again. We used to have sleepovers every weekend and we'd always bake brownies. And as we got older, we snuck wine out to the hot tub for our late night heart to hearts.

I nodded my head, "Yeah, that sounds great."

I took a sip of wine and cleared my throat, "Don't hate me for asking, but didn't you and Topper have a thing?"

Sarah swallowed a bite of brownie, "Whoa, do you really wanna know?"

I nodded my head, "I mean we're best friends and you're with John B and will probably marry him, so I'm not worried."

Sarah took a big gulp of her wine and I pressed record on my phone, "Yeah, we used to hook up in high school. He wanted to date me but I just wanted to have fun. I fell in love with John B and kind of ghosted him, I guess the same way I did you. I just got so wrapped up in him that I lost myself. But I still have feelings for Topper. I just don't know what to do. I always hoped when I grew up and was ready to settle down Topper would be there. But he's moved on and I'm not sure what I want."

I pressed end and sent the recording to Topper along with a text saying 'should I tell her about the plan?' I glanced over at Sarah, "John B doesn't make you happy?"

Sarah let out a long sigh, "He does, but we fight. He doesn't understand my life and I don't understand his. I don't know if we'll ever get past it."

Topper replied to my text saying 'No, not yet. If she finds out now she'll still hold the power and nothing will change.'

I gave her a sympathetic nod, "I get that. I think it's worth working on."