Jake led Charles towards the door of Captain Holt's house.
"It's true what they say. Now that I'm fully blind forever, my other senses are heightened" said Charles.
Jake let go of Charles' arm and Charles reached out towards the door.
"I feel a door" said Charles. He gasped. "We're at Captain Holt's house."
"Also, the GPS announced it when we pulled up" said Jake. "Hey, once we're inside, maybe keep your hands to yourself, all right? The captain can be very particular about his stuff."
Jake unlocked the door and they walked in to see clothes and shoes all over the floor, as well as a table that had been knocked to the floor.
"Cheddar! Let go! Let go of it!" said y/n from another room.
"Y/n?" asked Jake.
"This is a cashmere sweater!" said y/n.
Jake and Charles entered the room to see y/n trying to pull a sweater out of Cheddar's mouth.
"He got into Kevin's closet" said y/n, looking at Jake and Charles. "He was supposed to stay downstairs and Amy said that the binder was very clear about that. Why won't you respect the binder like I'm trying to?"
"Oh no, he's turning all the turtle necks into regular necks" said Jake. "Charles, you gotta help us."
"On it" said Charles, stumbling slightly. "Okay, the key with dogs is establishing the alpha. Cheddah, dwop it. Pwease dwop it. I'll give you anything you want."
"Oh, Cheddar is the alpha. Didn't expect that" commented Jake.
"Pwease, pwease, pwease" said Charles.
"Nice job, Boyle. It worked" said Jake as Cheddar dropped the sweater.
"But the mess, Jake, the mess!" said y/n, looking around the now messy room.
"Don't worry. We're gonna clean it up" said Jake calmly. "Everything is totally under control."
"Charles' pants are on fire" said y/n.
"What?" said Jake, turning around to see steam coming from around Charles' pants. "Boyle, the space heater! Get away from the space heater!"
"I don't know where it is!" said Charles, panicking as the smoke alarm began to beep. "I'm just gonna run at full speed!"
Charles ran forwards as Jake yelled "No!"
Charles tripped over the table and slid across the glass table slightly, shattering some ornaments that had been on the table.
"Charles, just stay where you are!" said Jake, grabbing one of the many sweaters that were in the room.
Jake used the sweater to fan the smoke away from Charles' pants.
"Whoo! It's okay. It's okay. Everything's fine" said Jake as the smoke alarm stopped beeping. "Fire's out. And this table is -"
The table that Charles was lying on collapsed.
"Oh!" said Jake and y/n.
"Fragile. I was gonna say fragile" said Jake. "Nailed it!"
"Oh my God!" said y/n.
----------------------
"Ah" said Jake, opening and closing the front door, trying to get some fresh air into the house. He stopped opening and closing the door and left it open and walked into the room where Charles and y/n were. "Okay. Great news. The smell of burnt sweatpants and singed leg hair is finally dissipating."
"I just hope I can grow it back by Speedo season" said Charles.
The phone rang. "Call from Raymond Holt, mobile."
"Oh, no. Not Holt" said y/n, picking up one final piece of clothing from the floor.
"Don't worry. I've got this" said Jake, picking up the phone. "Bonjour, Captain. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?"
"No, I don't want to sleep with you" said Holt, walking through the airport, his phone in one hand and his suitcase in the other.
"Is that what that means. Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor" said Jake.
"I'm calling to check in before I get on the flight" said Holt. "Everything okay?"
Jake scoffed. "Okay? Let's just say that if the house could talk, she would say, 'I've never been happier; I love Jake.'"
"Oh, that's interesting, because I think the house might say 'Jake's a liar, and I'm... on fire.'"
"What's that now?" asked Jake.
"The security company called me about the alarm" said Holt.
"Okay, the house was never on fire. Charles was on fire, and only on his pants, and we put it out" said Jake.
"I'm coming home right now" said Holt.
"Wait, no. Sir, please don't do that" said Jake. "You have to go see Kevin. Everything's fine."
"No, my decision is final. I'm postponing my flight" said Holt. "Goodbye, Jacob."
"No, sir! Please, please - ahh!" said Jake as Holt hung up the phone. "He said 'Jacob.' It's biblical. Guys, guys!"
Y/n and Charles ran into the room.
"Holt is headed home right now" said Jake.
"No! He can't come home" said y/n. "We left the door open and the dog ran out."
"What? We lost Cheddar!" said Jake.
Y/n nodded desperately.
"These silences are very hard for me to read. What's the vibe in here?" asked Charles.
"We're freaking out, Charles!" shouted Jake.
YOU ARE READING
Brooklyn 99: Jake Peralta x Reader
Fanfiction"We kissed, like, three hours ago" said Jake. "Yes, we did kiss... For reals" you said. "For reals, reals" Jake said. "Listen, I know you said you don't want to date cops, but I really like you." "I like you too" you said. Seasons 3 and 4 of Brookly...
