Amber & Honey ~ [DR3]

36. Girlfriend

You guys....I just don't even know where to start...100k?! That's really insane.
I hope you're strapped in and ready for this treat of a chapter!

Thank you so much (as always, but especially today)🥹🥺

"Hey!" Daniel is on the other side of the door, looking at me brightly when I open it. "You're not coming?" He asks words slow and surprised, light in his eyes dimming as I shake my head in confirmation.

I don't want to question how he knows I'm not joining tonight. It could be from Lando - who has already text me several times and then turned up at the same door to ask me to join. Any other day I'd be flattered by his determination to have me join, but not really now. It could also be my clothes - I'm still dressed in the things I wore to the track earlier. An oversized white linen shirt and light wash denim shorts, the light material was a dream in the stifling French heat. Even then, the hand held fan I'd hidden in my bag was a godsend. I spent the whole of qualifying moving it between Michael, Blake and myself in an effort to (try and) stay cool.

"Why?" Daniel asks quickly, his expression has dropped in concern as I open the door a little wider letting him enter the room.He immediately lets himself in as I walk away, reaching for my suitcase in search of some cotton wool and makeup remover before Daniel can have a look at my face in better lighting.

"I don't feel like it." Is all I offer. The words are plain and tinted with little emotion to give anything away.

"Charles is coming, I thought you'd want to try and grill him about Lilly?" Daniel asks sounding confused. I don't turn to face him, instead keep rifling through my bag for this stupid makeup remover. Honestly, I do want to do that, Lilly is fairly closed lipped about Charles, Charles is...easier to rake information from.

"Not today." Is all offer, finally grasping into my make up remover with a relieved sigh.

"Oka-a-ay." Is all Daniel says, his words are said slowly as he lingers in the room. I focus on squeezing the makeup remover onto the cotton wool before swiping it over my eyes taking off any lingering mascara and eyeliner away. "Have..." Daniel clears his throat and I lift my head to him. It takes a lot for him to be unsure of himself around me these days, the realisation that he is makes an uncertain feeling stir in me. There's few things we can't say to each other now, thus meaning, no more lingering in doorways for Daniel. Until now. "Have I done something?" He asks, looking unsure and with the words a seed of guilt blooms in my chest, my stomach twisting.

"No, not at all!" I say the words quickly. His shoulders sag in relief at my quick denial.

"Then what the hell is going on Amber?" He asks, a frown taking over his usually bright features. To see him sad and me be the cause makes me feel sick.

"It's really stupid." I remark with an eye roll. My eyes flicker tiredly with the action, the few dried tears I've already (rather pathetically) shed making them ache.

"Not if it's making you this upset." Daniel counters and I rub at the makeup of my other eye taking a deep breath. He may have a point, but I still feel pitiful. I pause in my spot, legs crossed on the floor infront of me as I fiddle with the makeup remover bottle in my hands. "Come here." He instructs his voice gentle and He shifts awkwardly around the room, nudging my bag out of the way with his hands so that we can both sit on the edge of the bed.

I nod at the instruction pushing myself up from the floor and joining him. He's dressed in ripped jeans and a T-shirt with his name on. I'd make fun of him for it if I didn't feel so deflated. When I sit beside him he hooks my knees over his, and pulls me in close to him, arm hooking around my back pulling me to his side, almost holding me like a baby. I chew on the inside of my lip as I huff quietly to myself, working how the courage to say my next words out loud.