Still The One (Sequel to Truly Madly Deeply)

Chapter 10

So people wanted another chapter, and I thought I'd be nice and give you one ;D

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Carly’s POV:

            “Wow,” Eleanor sighs, leaning back in her chair. “That’s... Something.”

            “It’s all so fucked up,” I let out a breath, picking up my latte.

            I was at Starbucks with Eleanor, Danielle, and Soha. Perrie would be here too, but she has rehearsals because of her upcoming tour. I just had finished explaining to the girls about what had happened between Harry and I last night, and it’s safe to say that the girls were shocked. Obviously, I understand why they are shocked – heck, even I am.

            Last night I hadn’t gotten any amount of sleep at all. I was twisting and turning in my bed, rethinking over and over what happened with Harry and I. I kissed him – and I liked it! But I can’t really say that. Harry... He’s my weakness. Whenever I’m around him, my heart starts beating faster, my knees become wobbly, my breathing hitches, and I just can’t seem to think straight. His voice sends shivers down my spine, his lips make me want to kiss him so badly, and his eyes always have me lost in them, and I just can’t pull myself out.

            You can’t understand how hard it is to say no when he asks to be back with me. Unless you’ve been in love before, you have no idea at how hard it is, no matter how much he has fucked you over, hurt you, or messed up. When I’m in love, I have the habit of looking past every single bad thing in Harry, and will do anything to have him back in my life. And no matter how strong I think I am, and no matter how many times I tell everyone that I will never let someone back into my life who hurt me so much, love changes everything. It makes you weak and vulnerable, and changes what you believe in, how you act, everything, and no matter what he has done, you would still do anything for him.

            That’s me and Harry. I love him so much, I know I do, but he hurt me. I’m conflicted on whether or not I should take him back. My heart says that I should, but my brain is telling me otherwise. That he hurt me, and he’ll most likely hurt me again.

            Love is complicated.

            “Do you think he hates me?” I ask suddenly, putting down my drink.

            “No, no!” Danielle says. “Of course he doesn’t, Carls. The boy loves you.”

            I let out a sigh. “Things are so messed up,” I say. “I just want them to go back to the way they were.”

            “Why don’t you want to be with Harry, though?” Soha asks, leaning forward. “I’m not understanding that.”

            I put my cup down. “I’m just scared, you know,” I say, crossing my legs. “I’m terrified that if we get back together, then something is gonna go wrong again. That we’ll just end up breaking up all over again.”