Tommy's Trans Teen Survival. // FTM // TommyInnit Angst. // DSMP

Part 15 ~ Sleep Over

TW- Underage Drinking, Drug Mention - Heroine, Meth, Weed, Cocaine , Drug Use - Weed

~ Tommy POV ~

We sit in the living room, watching Labyrinth, it's by far one of the films I love the most. My mum walks in and looks at Dream with his arm around George, then at me. She puts her bag down and sits down. "Hiya boys, how was your day today?" She asks, "It was good." I say, before they could say anything about me binding unsafely. "Why don't we go to the kitchen and warm you up?" I say and she folds her arms. "What are you hiding from me Thomas?" She asks, "Nothing!" I smile at her, she looks at George willing an answer. "He wore his binder for like over 24 hours." He says and I look at him.

"Tommy, you know you shouldn't do that." she says and I fold my arms. "I know." I say, "Why didn't you take it off?" She asks, I shrug and Dream pauses the movie, holding Georges hand. "You at least have to know the reason." She says, "You don't do things without knowing why you're doing them." She adds on. I had a short enough temper as it was, so I got up, walking upstairs, closing my door. I grab a bag and text Wilbur, he calls me so I answer. "Why do you wanna speak?" He asks and I open my wardrobe. "Can I sleep at yours? My mum said something in a harsh tone and I don't want to stay here for any longer." I ask and he hums, "Yeah, do you wanna talk about it at all? Maybe bring your brother as well, I'd like to meet him." He says, and I smile.

Me, Dream and George get on the train to Brighton, those two just flirted or something the whole way and I texted Wilbur. We get off the train and see Wilbur waiting at the entrance, I walk over and he pulls me into a hug, rubbing my back. Dream stands beside George with his arm around his shoulder. Wilbur looks at him, then at me, whispering. "What's with the mask?" I smile a bit, looking at Dream whispering back. "I don't actually have a brother, y'know." He looks at me confused, Dream greets him with no accent and Wilbur stares shocked. 

We get back to his house and Wilbur offers George one of his hoodies to warm up. He takes it, stepping away from Dreams grasp. Dream stands beside me as I throw my bag on his sofa. Wilbur and George sit in the kitchen and talk about life, future plans and other things. They try to include Dream, but he excludes himself, probably out of jealousy.

They didn't even try to include me in the conversation, so I walk and sit in the living room all by myself. I hear them laughing, Dream eventually joining in. It didn't make me feel welcome, like the little voice in the back of my head was telling me they didn't want me, and I believed it for some stupid reason. I picked up my bag, slinging it over my shoulder, opening the door as quietly as I could. Walking into the still pouring rain, closing the door very quietly. I walked down the steps and left very swiftly. I took a walk along the beach, it was empty and deserted. 

I walked around town, people staring at me. 1. I'm in the pouring rain with a hoodie and jeans on, 2. I have a bag that looks pretty much empty, 3. I look sad probably, 4. I'm alone. Sitting on a bench in the rain was a big mistake, I was probably going to get a cold, and the roadmen sitting next to me made me uncomfortable. But I did it anyway. "Fam, why're you alone in the rain? That's kinda sad mate." One of them says, I look at them, "I don't feel wanted, so I left without telling anyone." I say and they nod, "So, you're running away then?" They ask and I nod. "What is up with your posture as well?" They ask, and I look down. "I don't really like my chest, leaning forward helps me hide it." Oversharing to a roadman of all people wouldn't usually end well.

"Oh, you transgender? I'm not against it but most people here are." He says and I look at him, nodding. "Do you not have, uhh, a binder?" He asks and I shake my head. "My brother could have a spare binder, maybe even TransTape. If you wait here, right, I can get you some?" He offers, "If it's not much trouble." I say and he shrugs, "My mam told me I should try be nicer to people." He says, walking away. I put my hood up, putting my earphones in, listening to Bo Burnham.

I was so very rudely interrupted by a Twitch Notification, I look at it. 'WilburSoot is live! Talking with Tommy's brother.' I open the stream, watching Wilbur talk with Dream. "Where is Tommy?" George asks, interrupting them. "He was in the living room?" Wilbur asks and George shakes his head. "He's probably gone to the shop, I'm sure he's fine." Dream says, with the accent. The roadman sits next to me, looking at my phone. "You watch those guys too?" He asks and I look at him, "I guess so." I say, turning it off. "They're talking with my brother." I say and he passes me a Tupperware box with TransTape in it. "You're TommyInnit?" He asks and I nod. "Wait, so, they're the ones making you feel unwanted?" He asks again and I shrug, "It's stupid, they just exclude me from the conversation and stuff, they didn't even realise I left." I say and he hums. "Why don't you stay away for a few days? Book a hotel, make them worried." He says and I smile. "Good idea. I can probably turn it into an arg or something." I say and he smiles.

"I'll walk you there?" He offers and I nod, smiling. We get up, walking to the nearest hotel, booking a room for like a week with two beds. I get the key and we walk to my room, putting my bag down with the box. I got the two beds because we decided it'd be better if he stayed with me due to my steadily declining mental health. We made ourselves at home and got food. It was gonna be nice.

He pulls up the stream, connecting it to the TV so it doesn't show I'm watching it. "What did you study at school?" Wilbur asks, "Coding and stuff, nothing really interesting." Dream says, "Are you planning on streaming or making like, content at all?" George asks, and Dream looks at him, "Probably not. I'll probably be in a bit of Tommy's content, he's supposed to be filming something with me to post probably this week, a few upcoming streams with him. Not on my channel though." He says, "Bullshit." I say folding my arms. "Do you like beer?" He asks me and I look at him, "I was thinking we drink to get our mind off everything?" He says. "I've never had it." I say, "But I'm willing to try." I say and he grabs his bag, pulling out a few bottles of various alcohol. 

We drink some, and I end up drunkly sending donations to Wilbur. " Uhh 'Fuck yoi guys' Tommy. Where are you?" Wilbur asks, " 'not comung bsck, you gusy pised me pff' hang on, have you been drinking? No sober person types that badly. 'why wood I be drinking? I made a freind tho he's butter than you three' I swear to God, I'm telling Phil and your mum." Wilbur says, ending the stream. I get a facetime call from George, going onto the balcony answering it. I turn so he can see the view and not the hotel room, taking a sip of my beer. It was nasty shit, but I was already drunk so I didn't care. 

"Tommy! Where the hell are you? Why are you so high up?" He asks and I put the bottle down. "It's a nice view." I hum, feeling pretty lightheaded. I walk back into the hotel room where the kid is rolling a cig with weed. "D'you want some?" He asks and I look at it. "What is it?" I ask and he smiles. "Weed, it helps me calm down after a stressful day, it seems you've had one." He explains, "Tommy, don't you dare." George warns, but I hang up, agreeing to it. We go to the balcony and he lights it, taking a puff, passing me it. I take a puff, coughing. "It takes a bit to get used to it." He says, while he pats my back. I take another one, passing him it back. He smokes it, taking a seat on the balcony chairs, passing me it. I smoke some, only coughing a bit. 

We were drunk and high 17 year olds on a hotel balcony, probably being worried about. It was fun if I'm honest. "I have other things if you wanna try them?" He asks and I look at him, smoking more of the joint. "Like what?" I ask and he grabs his bag from behind the balcony door, pulling out a box. "Uhh, I have more weed, meth, heroine, cocaine a few others." He hums. I shrug, passing him the joint to finish. I was already feeling it's effects on me. I got another call, this time from my mum. I put it on the table, answering, putting it on speaker. "Tommy. What on earth do you think you're doing?!" She shouts, and I hum, "Weed?" I was pretty out of it, "You better not be. Sober up, tell Wilbur where you are and get home." She says, I hang up the phone, 

"What does cocaine feel like?" I ask and he smiles.