Unravel | Jeverus

Part 23

James stood there, hands pinching his shirt so tight it bunched up and slid his sleeve upwards.

He had heard what Severus said, some words slipped his mind as he stared at him. The boy he loved, the person he never would've thought of loving.

The one thing that kept him sane.

" Please don't regret it in the future. Don't let me hurt you like i hurt myself."

The sentences felt unreal as he heard them. How could Severus do anything to make him regret it. So many moments between them and James could never get enough. There wouldn't be any amount of time in the world that seemed enough.

He was already this deep after just a few months and he was sure he'd fall deeper.

There was nothing to pull him out.

" I won't."

" Promise?" Severus asked and the way his voice shook made James lose all self control.

" I promise."

" Good." Severus said before he walked in, making James take a step backwards as he closed the door.

The moment Severus' lips touched his, it felt like his emotions had exploded. A million different feelings, a litany of words that broke into his head.

He tasted the bitter vodka in his mouth but he didn't care.

The lingering touches he thought he imagined was now real, the hands that engulfed his face found their way back home. The body heat he missed so much was now pressed against him and pushing him towards the wall.

A hand slid to the back of his head where he would've hit the wall, protecting him.

James doesn't think he's ever wanted something so much in his life. He was drunk with the knowledge Severus was finally giving in.

He was finally ready and it brought back feelings he said he should've put down but never did. It felt like he was dreaming.

" I love you so much." Severus whispered when he pulled away and finally took in a breath.

James laughed with tears in his eyes when he heard that. He wrapped his arms around Severus lightly which then turned iron gripped and he sighed in relief.

His chest heaved and Severus' face was buried in his neck.

" I don't think I've ever been this happy."

Severus chuckled but it was muffled with tears, relieved ones that he never thought he'd be able to shed and James was more of the same.

Everyone wants him because he's James Potter, nobody wants him because he's him.

And he finally felt loved, happy and complete. Not wondering if he'll ever feel the same way about someone else, someone in the future. He didn't feel like losing hope or that everything was pointless.

He felt comfortable and joy knowing tomorrow morning he would wake up next to Severus and be able to call him mine.

All his.

" I love you too." He whispered and kissed him again, feeling a tear fall from Severus' face onto his own cheek.

" I'm so relieved." Severus laughed.

James wanted to cry too but he didn't have any other feeling except for joy at the moment.

This moment—this exact point in time, it was like he got everything he'd ever needed.

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When Severus sees James walking into a room it's like seeing the sunrise after a bad nights sleep. Relief it's over and happiness to have light shed into the darkness.

And when James sits next to him it's like he has supports there to catch him just in case.

But he didn't think it'd be this way.

" So....are we like boyfriends now?" James asked, face in Severus' chest as they laid in bed together.

The candles sat idly as Severus ran his hands through James' hair and massaged his scalp. The strands were thick and soft, smelling vaguely like coconut.

" Yeah. We are."

The confirmation felt good to hear, James smiling into him like a lovesick puppy who was just given a treat.

It felt good to say too.

" My boyfriend. Hm." James hummed and Severus found himself smiling.

" My boyfriend, the infamous James Potter. The girls will be rioting soon." He said and James dug his face deeper, in shame or embarrassment. Or pride.

" I like how it sounds. Boyfriend."

" It makes you that happy?" Severus asked and James nodded.

" I've been a boyfriend before but i've never been able to call someone else that."

Severus smirked and nodded.

James Potter's first boyfriend. If he can't be his first love or his last, he'll always be his first boyfriend. And it was comforting.

" I hope I'm your last."

" Me too."

For the first time James could forget everything that's happened to him. He could live in the moment without a second thought or his past bringing up nightmares.

He knows he won't be okay just because he has Severus now, he knows they both have work to do.

But god did it feel good to not sleep in the same bed as just 'friends'.

Tomorrow he'd walk around the school with a title, a duty.

Someone's boyfriend. And that someone is the one person he could never ever get enough of.