Cosmic Stardust - Jegulus

Chapter 4

So my bestie Horace (the person this fic is dedicated to) has some really important scary stuff happening today so I thought I'd do a double update. I hope it all went ok Horace!!! Spam me to lmk how it went and I hope this chapter makes u feel better if it didn't go great ;P <333

TW - mentioning the misgendering of the last chapter (basically just a discussion of what happened last chapter so if you skipped the last one due to the TW then I'd advise to read this with caution) <3

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I didn't talk to anyone until the next day around lunchtime. No one came to bother me until I heard someone knocking on the door.

"Who is it?" I asked. Usually I would have said come in straight away. Mother and father said I'm not allowed to keep people waiting when they've come to see me. But if it was Sirius, I didn't want to let him in.

"It's me," a voice said from the other side, it was Euphemia.

"Come in," I said even though I was more than happy lying here, unmoved since yesterday, feeling sorry for myself.

The door opened slowly, the house was suspiciously quiet but I was only focused on the woman who walked into the room, a plate of toast and eggs in her hand as well as a cup of water. I hate juice so if it's for me then water was a good choice.

"I know it's almost lunchtime, but you missed breakfast this morning so I thought I'd bring you some. Breakfast in bed," she said the last part and I imagined her doing 'jazz hands' if her hands weren't full.

"Thanks," I said, it only just dawned on me how scratchy my voice was from screaming yesterday and not speaking since then.

She asked if she could sit on the bed and I nodded, I wasn't about to say no to an adult. Besides, it's her house, she can do whatever she wants in it. She perched on the side of the bed before placing the plate of food on the empty side of the bed and placing the glass of water on the bedside table.

"You must be hungry," she mentioned. I shrugged, I hadn't really thought about it and I didn't have much of an appetite to eat the food she brought me, even though it looks nice.

"How're you feeling?" She then asked, her face adopting this terribly worried look that I hated, because her face was a happy type of face, and I never wanted to see it sad. It made me feel really upset.

"Just tired," I mumbled because I didn't know what else to say. She studied me, clearly not satisfied with my response.

"Sirius told us what happened yesterday. We heard some of it too." She said cautiously, as if scared that just mentioning it was going to trigger me.

"What- what did he tell you?" I asked, a little nervous because I very clearly remember him misgendering me and stuff, and I really hoped he didn't tell them about that.

"He told us about what your parents were planning for you, and about the pressure they put on you with your appearance and stuff." She said softly and my breath caught in my throat. Please, he can't have told them.

"Did he- did he say anything else?" I asked, I needed to know, but I didn't want to ask 'did he tell you that I'm actually a boy and he called me my deadname that makes me hate myself?', just in case she didn't know.

"He said that you don't want to get the dark mark, and that you got angry when he asked about it." She responded. Ok, so he didn't tell them?

I nodded.

"I can see why that might make you angry. You see, the difference between us and them, is that boys sadly aren't as emotionally intelligent as us women are. Sometimes they say or do things that don't seem like such a big deal to them, but to us it is so much more." I know she was trying to make me feel better and get a little playful jab at the boys for not understanding empathy and stuff as much, but it made me feel so awkward I almost wanted to laugh, I was so uncomfortable.