Chapter 4

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Luca and I made a habit of talking on the phone almost every night since that first time a few days ago. Luca and I ran into each other only four days ago. I still have a hard time believing that I really met a famous actor, someone I have been admiring for months. The more we talked and chatted, the more I got to know the person behind those pictures and interviews that fill the internet.

I of course knew that people are different from how they are portraited in the media. No one is the same at work as they are at home. When talking to the press you have to put up an act, I don't believe anyone can be their true self when facing that much media attention.

He hasn't talked about his work a lot, only mentions some small things a few times. He talked about how he gets to travel to new places, meet so many new people. That part of his job sounds great, but I don't think I could deal with all the publicity that comes along with it.

The more I get to know Luca, the more I can see who he is, not the person the internet had me believe. Not that the idea I had of him was that much of a lie. He is all that, amazing, talented, kind. But he is much more than that. He is smart, caring, funny. Very handsome.

I've been trying not to think about him or our conversations too much. He keeps my mind occupied, too occupied. Ever since I met him I have hardly been able to get anything done. At work, I'm hoping he might come in for another coffee. During my lectures, I think about what he might be doing. When I'm home trying to get my coursework done I wonder if we will call again that night.

Normally I'm so shut off from other people, especially people my age. I don't talk easily to people I don't know. I tend to be shy, quiet. More observing than participating in conversations. I started to become more social when I came to university, making friends that early on really helped me. Madison and Tess know about my history they know about me having social anxiety.

It can be difficult sometimes, I tend to close off when things get too much for me, pull away from people I care for. My friends know that that is a way for me to cope with things, they also know how to pull me out of it. Within weeks they figured out how to best engage me in conversations when I start to close myself off, they invite me to shopping trips when they notice I'm not having my day. They somehow know exactly when to give me time alone and when to pull me out of that dark cloud that is my mind.

It's just past noon, the library feeling desolate and dark. I guess not many students want to spend their Friday afternoons hidden away in the library when exams are still months away.

Normally I wouldn't bother with going to the library either. I have a perfectly fine desk in my flat and there I at least have all the snacks I need while studying within arm's reach. If it wasn't for the construction site across the road I would have been just fine in my flat but the noise was getting too loud to focus so I packed my stuff and got on the train to go to the university library instead.

I have an essay due at midnight so I need to focus, I need to finish this today. Being surrounded by nothing other than utter silence I can finally get to work. I have twenty different tabs open in my browser, my mind just as messy and disorganised as my browser by now. With the research I already did and throwing a bunch of words into the thesaurus to find fancier words, I'm close to finishing. If it weren't for Luca ringing me I probably would have finished within half an hour but I decide I can use the break and answer my phone. Since no one else is in the room I can talk freely without interrupting people.

"Hey! How are you doing today?"

"I'm fine, a bit tired, what about you?"

"I've been reading scripts all morning for some auditions next week."

"That's more exciting than what I've been doing all day. This essay is driving me insane."

"Ah shit, did I interrupt your studying?"

"I needed a break anyway. Tell me something fun to get me out of this boring study mood."

"I'm thinking about going on a trip to visit my grandma soon."

"That's so exciting! Do you talk to her often?"

"Yeah, we call at least once a week. And one of the neighbourhood kids taught her how to use facetime so that's always fun to do."

"I can't even imagine my grandparents using facetime, that would probably end in a disaster. I can already imagine it."

"She's surprisingly good at it. Do you have any plans for tomorrow?"

"I have an early shift at work but after that, I don't have anything planned."

"How do you feel about me stealing you for the afternoon? I want to show you this place that I think you will love."

"Alright, I'm in. Just tell me when and where."

"I'll text you the deeds. Bye Sky!"

He ends the call before I can say goodbye properly. I'm excited to see him again but it also makes me nervous already. For now, I let the excitement win and with a huge grin on my face, I continue working on my essay.

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