Sam Golbach and Colby Brock one shots

Why

TRIGGER WARNING THERE WILL BE SELF-HARM AND ATTEMPTS OF SUICIDE SO PLEASE DON'T READ THIS CHAPTER IF YOU WILL BE TRIGGERED

I love Sam so much but ever since he and Colby reconnected he's been ignoring me so much lately. But today he's finally gonna be home, or so I thought. "Hey, babe!" I said excitedly as I ran to hug Sam, "hey" he said blankly. "So what do you want to do today?" I asked to hope for a movie or something. "What do you mean? I'm hanging out with Colby" that was the last straw. "What?!" I started to raise my voice. "Yeah jeez, can you quit yelling?" He said looking down at his phone. "OH MY GOD SAM! YOU HAVE BEEN SUCH A DICK LATELY! YOU NEVER HANG OUT WITH ME ANYMORE IT'S ALL ABOUT COLBY! COLBY THIS! COLBY THAT why can't you just hang out with me for once?" I yelled but quieted down at the end as angry tears formed. "Oh my god stop being a bitch about-" he cut himself off and threw his hand over his mouth as his eyes widened. "Maddie I di-" I quickly cut him off and said. "Leave, just go hang out with Colby" I looked down as I started to cry. "Bu-" I cut him off once again. "No, I'm done arguing, go" he looked down sadly and walked out.

SAMS POV

Oh god, what did I just do?! I just banged my head on my hand regretting everything I did to Maddie. She was right, I have been a dick lately, ditching her to go out and party with Colby every night, never making any to me for her. Might not be the best choice right now but I called Colby. "Hey dude" his voice rang through my ears. "I fucked up man, can you come to get me?" I asked because I left my keys inside and didn't want to piss her off anymore, though now, I wished I had. "Yeah of course brother, I'm on my way." We hung up and I just waited for Colby. "God, why am I so stupi-" I was cut off by a running car pulling into the driveway. "Dude, what's wrong?" Colby asked as I got into the car. "I fucked up man. Maddie and I got into an argument because I've been such a dick lately. I always ditch her to hang out with you and I just lost all train of thought and dude I- I called her a bitch" tears started to form in my eyes. "what makes it worse is that I can't go back in and bother her but man I'm so worried. Her mental health hasn't been the best lately and I'm just scared she's gonna-" tears rolled down my face as Colby cut me off. "Dude, go back in there, apologize, and everything will be ok" he smiled gently as I calmed down. "Ok, but will you stay here in case something does happen?" I asked wiping the tears. He nodded and I got out, running inside.

Maddies POV

Fuck. I fucked up, why did I tell him to leave, I can't control myself. Shit. Tears rolled down my face as I thought about all the good times Sam and I had, WHY THE FUCK DID I TELL HIM TO LEAVE. I fell to my knees and started sobbing uncontrollably. God. I'm so fucking stupid, I don't deserve Sam, I don't deserve happiness. I don't even deserve to fucking live. I got up and ran to my bathroom and started rummaging through the drawers to find my hidden blade that Sam didn't know about. 1 cut for my stupidity. 1 cut for telling Sam to leave. 2 cuts for being such a bitch and not letting him hang out with Colby. As I watched the blood run down my arm I thought about how if I'm gonna die I need to write a note.

                  Dear Sam,

      I love you so much, you will never know how much I actually love you. You have made me the happiest I've been in years and knowing I don't do the same for you pains me to my core. I've tried my hardest to be the perfect girlfriend for you but I will always just be the bitch that annoys you. Tell Kat, Tara, Colby, Jake, Corey, my mom, and my dad that I love them all so much and I will come to visit them. Tell my sister I will make sure to make the prettiest sky for her even if I don't have the prettiest face. I hope this will finally make you happy. I love you so much Sam and I hope you actually find a girl who makes you happy.

I was slowly losing my conscience so I placed the note beside me and grabbed the blade one last time making a deep cut on my wrist but not before hearing the door slam open. "MADDIE!" Sams voice sounded recked, this is what I do to him, it's my fault.