Heyyy,
Firstly Happy New Year's.
It's been more than an hour since New Year's to be exact. And celebrations are not yet over. Slowed, definitely. But still going on. There's music because some people are partying hard. And why shouldn't they. Not everyone has this same unlucky fate as I do.
I've been listening to the sound of non-stop firecrackers, music, wishes.....
And I'm locked inside my house trying to complete my homework. Also, I was the first one to wish myself. Also the only. (My friend wished me ofc, but my emotions are just too depressed right now to count that)
My parents went to sleep, mother to be exact. My father's a night dog (sorry but I don't want to disrespect owl by using it as a metaphor for MY DAD). My brother's sound asleep, snoring beside me. And here I am. It's not my fault I can't sleep at night. It's generic, right..?
Well I'm feeling like hell right now. I wanna escape this place. I'd do anything to escape this. And right now I can really feel what 'bad' feels like. I wanna cry but the hormones that trigger tears don't seem to work anymore. So I'm writing. This is my only escape or I'll eat myself (just kidding). Tbh I get scared from myself sometimes....
This book was not at all inspired by 'The diary of a young girl'.... And I thought this very original name myself.....
Well if I ever become famous after dying (take it as light joke) I would want people to atleast know me. Really. I hardly show any emotions alive. Can't blame me. Trust issues. Maybe death will do something good to me. Well that is the reason I kept it 'lonely'. I've always thought that there's no word made that could fit me perfectly. And here I am.
I've been scared to be lonely. All my life. And when you try to escape something that you hate the most, THE UNIVERSE is GRATEFUL ENOUGH to throw you the exact same thing. I LOVE universe btw...
Honestly, I'm quite excited to see where life takes me now. It has already shoven me into a vampire carriage aka my loneliness. What could be worse..
Enough for today. I'm bambling right now and I HATE it. But bad days are bad days. No. Bad days are worst days.
Let me see how long it lasts.
Torture you tomorrow,
Byeee,
Esmeray Love.
YOU ARE READING
The Diary Of A Lonely Girl By Esmeray Love
Non-FictionAs the title suggests, I'm lonely. 110% of people in this world are. But that's not the point. I'm a mix a lot of things, a lot of emotions, but I've always denied that one emotion. That scared me to death. But here I am doing something I promised I...
