When The Tiger Lilies Bloom | Taekook

23. Still With You

Jungkook blinked twice, hands trembling, eyes not leaving the man in front of him. The tears rolled out of Taehyung's eyes making his heart clench, no words coming out even though he badly wanted to say something to Taehyung. Jungkook watched the man silently letting his tears fall, each drop reminded him of the petal of a cherry blossom in Autumn.

That's the thing. Taehyung didn't know what happened to his voice, why it was not coming out as his brain was screaming inside. To confess. But only the tears spoke, rolling down his cheeks, burning against his skin. The words, none of it came out and Jungkook could not hear him in silence. They were not that close to reading each other's unsaid words and Taehyung felt like a fool.

Jungkook had his eyes settled on him, wide and dumbfounded only for Taehyung to skip some heartbeat, his body started to tremble. He knows he might look like a weak, insane person to Jungkook but he doesn't care. Taehyung was already on the verge of breaking apart with all those piled up inside him and the helplessness of not saying it out loud doesn't make him feel any better.

He found no other way instead of drawing his heart out on the paper since he could not work out his feelings for Jungkook. His lovesick soul felt lonely as he stared at Jungkook's perplexed eyes.

"Taehyung-- are you okay? Is something wrong?"

Jungkook sounded worried, the pain lacing through his smooth words and Taehyung pressed his lips together. Everything, everything is wrong. He wanted to say. He kept his gaze on Jungkook, snapping out and wiping his cheeks before shaking his head. Jungkook was about to open his mouth to say something again, Taehyung voiced out with a broken sob.

"What are you trying to say? I can't understand-"

"You should go, Jungkook."

Those were the only words left from Taehyung's mouth. He blinked back the tears stinging inside his eyes, vulnerable to look at the man in front of him.

Stay away. Stay away from me and my heart.

Taehyung kept it in him, pushing Jungkook slightly with his trembling hands. The other didn't say anything back but Taehyung knew Jungkook indeed wanted to know a lot, about what happened to him, about the silent tears and the words Taehyung suppressed, and about the painting. But he didn't ask anything which Taehyung was thankful for as he turned away to face the messy paint palettes and half-finished canvases.

Jungkook walked out slowly, heart shuddering at the sound of Taehyung closing the door behind him. He shut his eyes in a snap, took a deep breath, and tried to clear his head. It was a failed attempt though he couldn't help but wonder what went on in Taehyung's mind or even the portrait he made. Oh, the portrait.

He stopped on his track, staring around space, and then recollected every stroke Taehyung made on that white boring canvas. The day, the rain, and his tears, everything was clear and beautiful, alive and hurting especially when Taehyung was the one who painted that.

For a moment, Jungkook doubted if he could distinguish his real self and the painting, and Taehyung's eyes told him another story.

A story of pain, hope, and waiting.

But Jungkook was not that brilliant to know what they meant to Taehyung.

~ 🍂 ~

Days passed after the encounter with Jungkook, Taehyung skipped his classes and busied himself with the council programs. Though it's been a while, Taehyung remembers that day- clear as the sky above him- how it was raining heavily and how he got scolded by the librarian for entering the library with dampened clothes and muddy feet. He could trace the way Jungkook was sitting there even now just with his eyes.