Who's that knocking at 4 in the morning?

Chapter 8

A few days had passed by and I still hadn't found the balls to send a message to Colson.

I had decided twice that this baby wasn't a good idea, I didn't want the media frenzy and that I was going to have an abortion but I also decided against it both times too, so I was still confused as ever and I still weren't feeling great either.

I had however planned to go for food with everyone this evening for Kyle's birthday, everyone other than Skylar that was, who still wasn't speaking to us for no apparent reason.

I managed to keep some toast down and my coffee this morning which was great, it meant I could start work with a little more motivation this morning, luckily for me being a business owner means I can work from home and I don't always need to be in the office, which I'm thankful for, especially in situations where I'm not feeling the best.

Finally it came to 16:00pm and it was time to get showered and changed.

I went with my long black knitted dress, a brown coat and matching brown louboutins.

I was giving myself a last glance in the mirror when my attention turned to my stomach and I started picturing my tummy with a bump and how much I would love to share this experience with someone.

At one point in my life there is nothing more I wanted than to have a baby and be in a stable relationship and share this experience with someone who loved me, but the reality is, Colson doesn't belong to me, he's barely stable from what I've seen in the past and I want my child to live a normal life.

I sat back down on my bed for a few minutes, this was all too much but one thing I did know is that I needed to tell him so I grabbed my phone and started to draft him a message through Instagram.

An hour later

I had typed every possible combination of 'I am pregnant' and the message still didn't sit right with me.

I needed to just do it.

So here goes:

Hi, I don't know how to tell you this, so I'm just going to get it all down and send it over. I haven't been feeling well and i took 3 early detection pregnancy tests and they all came back positive. To save the awkwardness, the baby is obviously yours hence why were having this conversation and other than you, I haven't slept with anyone in a very long time, I'm talking at least 8 months easily and again other than you, I have never had unprotected sex. I hope that clears up any questions of paternity you may have.

I haven't decided whether im keeping the baby yet but if I do then I understand how awkward this is for you with your fiance and all but you don't need to be involved and i will keep it low-key and no one has to know.

I will let you know my decision.

Sent.

My heart started racing and it took my all to not delete it, I didn't think it was possible to feel any more sicker than I already felt.

I needed to leave, so I grabbed my keys and left my phone on the kitchen side, I was scared to see his reply that is, if he replies at all and I didn't want an argument with him either.

So, I went to go and enjoy Kyle's birthday in peace and then deal with the fallout afterwards.

I had the best time at Kyle's birthday meal, we went to this really fancy Japanese place that had the best, well... everything and from what I saw the cocktails looked amazing too.

I also managed to keep my fancy ramen down which was good, I felt so much better once I had eaten and I had forgotten all about the message I sent.

"Let's go to Twist" Jacob shouted to everyone.

Everyone was down and I could do with a dance and besides Twist is a classy bar, it's not a place you go to when your a young teen who's just turned 18.

After 20 minutes of waiting for an Uber that didn't show, we all decided to walk so I linked my arm with Amy's and we all started walking.

After another 20 minutes we arrived, the man at the entrance took our coats and we went to sit down at a table.

"Amber, what are you having to drink?" Jacob shouted over the music

"Water please"

He cocked his eyebrow.

"I'm on strong migraine medication and I can't mix alcohol with it" I lied.

"Oh, right okay, I thought you were letting the team down then" he joked.

"Let's dance girls" Hannah grabbed us and lead us to the dance floor where Kyle, his dad and brother were already dancing their asses off.

We were dancing for what felt like hours, it was nice to take a break from throwing up, but when I looked at the time it was after midnight I had been out for hours and I was getting tired.

I said Goodnight to everyone and left.

I reached my apartment door and couldn't wait to kick my heels off and just dive right into bed. I grabbed a glass of water and continued to head towards the living room section of my open plan apartment, I flicked the light switch on and froze, dropping my glass in the process.

"Surprise"