Thirty-seven || Brylan

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'Brylan?'

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'Brylan?'

Trying to decide whether it would be better for me to respond or pretend to be asleep she speaks before I can come to a verdict. 'Dad said he wants to talk to you.'

Pretending to sleep it is.

I doubt she believes it though. It's been almost two days and I've barely left my room for anything at all. Someone can only be asleep for so long and forty-eight hours is definitely long too long.

I hadn't realized how difficult it was to avoid people in this day and age until recently. Alex and Katie have been blowing up my phone but I appreciate the fact that they respected my wishes and didn't come over. It didn't slow them down though and I ended up switching my phone off. Well—It was off for thirty minutes before I turned it back on because I don't want to miss a call from him.

It's not like he's ignoring me but he's not not ignoring me either. If that makes sense. Every-time I message Damon he responds which sounds great but he's just responding. There's no input, it just seems like I'm interviewing him, so I stopped. It's scaring the shit outta me because I don't know what's happening.

I understand if he wants space since he's in the hospital. The hospital I put him in because I thought it would be a good idea to let him talk to him knowing exactly what his goal was. It was stupid, I don't know what I expected to happen. I put so much immediate pressure on him to make me feel better and he was trying his best. It's not his fault.

Hearing the door shut I assume she left. I don't mean to ignore my sister but I'm not having it right now. If anything I think I'm just embarrassed. Embarrassed that I admitted to my parents what actually happened when they noticed the marks on my neck. They accused Damon and it got under my skin because he was trying to help me and I couldn't even get to him.

He was so afraid before the ambulance showed up and I wasn't allowed in a ten meter radius from him. I've never seen him so shaken up and stressed before and he kept asking if he was okay. He was frantically apologizing so much and I couldn't even get to him. So naturally the last people I want to see are the ones who stopped me. My parents.

To a certain degree I guess I understood why they'd assume the worst. They found out he hurt someone so they didn't let me close to him. That's why I caved. I told them what was going on when we got kicked out of Damon's room and I had to repeat myself a couple times for them to take it seriously. When they decided to ask around it became clear that I wasn't lying when Zayn only incriminated himself. He wouldn't talk even if he was asked basic questions and it only made him look worse because he wasn't saying he didn't do it.

It's just been awkward I guess. I don't know what to say to them now and they've been calling for me and I've been ignoring it. The whole thing is a mess. A mess that wouldn't have happened if Zayn just left me alone. I don't even understand why this keeps happening. It's not like I'm special or anything. I have nothing interesting to give so why do people keep taking and taking.

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