Mea Savanna, strong, caring and bold. Dropping out of college wasn't in her to do list but after her mother's death; everything went down hell. She decides to move to the city, and just forget every ounce of unhappiness her home town had brought her...
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𓆩 𝓜𝓮𝓪 𓆪
I pace around the living room of my apartment as i nervously bite into my nails.
Why is it so hard to open up, why is it so hard for me to just say it. I don't want to be like this anymore. Nate has been nothing but honest and truthful with me, he opened up to me a few days ago and gave me his trust, and i still yet to tell him anything about me. He deserves to know.
I want to let him into my heart. I want to let it all out and just take a deep breath.
I trust Nate, i do. Its just- its so hard to put those hidden pieces of you on display, at least to me it is. I hate when people see right through me. I hate to feel exposed; like an open book.
I was so blunt in the past, i gave my heart to the wrong people and they used it against me, they took my trust and stomped on it like it was a piece of shit. I don't want to go through that again. If i know one thing for sure, is that Nate wouldn't use me. He gave me his secret, multiple. He gave me his trust. That can only mean one thing and that he wants me to see that i can trust him enough to tell him everything. To finally open up.
And i will, i promise i will. Its just not that easy.
I click the call button and wait as the phone rings, i put it against my ear and jump when i hear Nate's voice "Sweetheart?" he acknowledges.
"Hi." i sigh, walking over to the window and looking at the view of New York City. The sun is bright today, shining through the sky "What are you doing?" i question. I'm dragging this!!
He cackles "Uh, i'm working." he simply says. This must feel strange because i never call Nate just like that, to kiki or some shit. He never likes to chat anyway. He never talks unless it's necessary. He talks to me though, that makes me smile like an idiot "What's on your mind?" his voice comes through again when i don't speak.
"Just- asking about the weather." i say awkwardly.
Stupid, stupid, stupid!
"The weather you say, huh?" i can just hear the smile in his voice "Enlighten me sweetheart."
"What did you eat for breakfast this morning?" i slap my forehead the minute i say that. Just fucking invite him over and get if over with Mea!
"Oh so we're doing this? Alright let's see," he says knowingly, i ignore it. He takes a minute to respond like he's trying to remember what he ate for breakfast "Pancakes with syrup and whipped cream.. Alot of whipped cream. Love and i made it together before she went off to school."
"Yum." i say "I personally like chocolate syrup with my pancakes."
I'm gonna kill myself.
"Do you now?" he cackles.
"Mhm." i clear my throat "Do you like milkshakes?" i grip my hair and pull it hard, causing myself pain.
"Sure." he keeps it short "Are you still going to stall, sweetheart?"
