Rose petals

Chapter 32

You know those scenes in movies where you're at a party or sat at a busy dinner table but everything around you is moving in slow motion? The voices of the hundreds of people around is muffled as though you're under water and you're completely zoned out. You're staring at a blank wall while everyone laughs and talks, paying you no attention.

That's how I feel right now. Despite there only being five of us sat at the dinner table, the adults are all conversing with each other but I'm zoned out into another world. I've always been a day dreamer but this is different, this is me zoning off into a whole new world, cue Jasmine, where I'm just spectating.

"...mayo?" I heard as I felt someone nudge my arm with theirs snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?" I asked, blinking a few times to join back in with reality as I looked over at my left to see Aiden giving me a weird look.

"I said can you pass me mayo you freak." He said as he rolled his eyes while I rolled mine and moved the mayo further away before turning back to my food.

He let out a huff before standing up and leaning over the table to pick it up, making sure to elbow my head in the process of doing it. Rolling my eyes once again I shoved him with my shoulder once he sat down before instantly shuffling closer to the end of the table, knowing it wouldn't do anything to stop him from shoving me back.

"Aiden leave your sister alone." Dad said as he walked back into the dining room and took a seat with two glasses of apple juice in his hands.

"She started it." He grumbled as he shot me a glare before sinking into his seat. You wouldn't believe he's in his late twenties with the way he behaves.

Ignoring him, dad slid me my glass of apple juice before digging into his food while Austin and mom continued talking. Dad joined in barely moments later and before I knew it the loud chatter resumed and I was back to staring at the wall while occasionally taking small bites of my slice of pizza.

My brain felt fuzzy. You know on the old televisions where there would be no signal so black and white fuzz would fill the screen? That's a literal representation of my brain in this moment of time and I have no idea how I feel about it. Random clips of my memory keep flashing on the white wall I'm staring at, my eyes being the projectors however I have no recollection of them happening.

Blaming my constant need to daydream, I tried shaking the thoughts out of my head before turning back to my food. i finished my slice of pizza and pushed my plate away before getting up from my seat and silently made my way out of the dining room. I could hear their four muffled voices asking me where I was going but I was in some sort of trance with the way my legs had a mind of their own, while my brain was barely registering my thoughts.

The cold blast of air hit me in the face and almost instantly I was aware of where I was. I was no longer inside but instead I was stood out in the cold hugging my thick cardigan tighter around me. I could hear the wind whistling with how hard it was blowing. Watching the leaves fall off the trees and get blown away by the wind, I walked out into the backyard and sat down on the cold grass.

Lying on my back, I stared up at the greying sky and watched the cloudy gently glide across. My cheeks slowly became numb with how cold it was and it wasn't long till I could no longer feel the cold wind biting at me but welcomed it instead.

Closing my eyes, I gave my brain a blank canvas to project on. All day I've been seeing clips and images of people I don't know, things I don't remember happening, and then a headache to top it all off. It's been slowly draining me to the point where hard floor out here in the back garden where the temperate feels as though it's below freezing point is comfortable enough for me to sleep on.