Love or Foe [COMPLETED]

Beam

I felt as time passed, the dynamics between Lam and me had changed. We had started becoming super close. Despite telling myself to make sure I don't end up falling for him even harder and trying conscientiously to keep a distance from him, I still found myself hanging out with him. And he made it so much more easier by looking for me, making sure group plans fit around my schedule, he often bought me meals, sending and picking me up home.

Even though I often rejected the offers, Lam didn't take no for an answer. Eventually, I decided to just give up fighting it and accepting it. Maybe this was just Lam's way of being close friends. Who am I to deny that right?

We has started spending the weekend having breakfast together before separating for our own activities. Just as usual, this Saturday we met at Morning Mama for breakfast.

"Any plans for today?"

"Yea. I'm going to meet Linn for a movie and lunch later."

"Oh. Whose Linn?"

"She's my junior from my photography elective. She has been asking me out for the longest period. I finally agreed to go out with her."

"Oh like a date?"

"I guess you can say that."

"Ah okays."

"That's fine right? I mean I'm not exclusively dating her or anything. I did make that very very clear. I felt bad because she has been asking me out and finally she resorted to asking me to at least say yes as a friend."

"Don't worry about it Beam. I think that's completely fine. I..I mean no one is going to mistake you and plus you don't have to answer to anyone else but yourself. Do what will make you happy ok?"

I nodded. I knew Lam was being sensible though I had hoped for a little more jealousy. But I found it so attractive that he was trusting and respected me to make my own decisions.

Ah, you tell me why wouldn't it be difficult then not to fall for him?! Stay still, my heart. Stay still.

We got through breakfast and hung out chatting till about 12noon when Lam offered to send me over to the mall. I smiled and thanked him for the offer. Just as he dropped me off, Linn came up. She smiled and greeted him too.

"Text me if you would like me to pick you up ok? Have fun"

I nodded at Lam who just rode off thereafter. Linn smiled at me, starting to see clearly why I didn't want to go out with her. She did ask if Lam was OK with it.

"He isn't my boyfriend. But yea he is ok with it." And I blushed like a fucking tomato when I said that. Linn chortled at my cute reaction and just held onto my arm and brought me in. I was the perfect gentleman, buying her lunch and the movie tickets plus snacks. We had a good afternoon and then around 5pm, Lam came by to pick us up. He came by in his car this time, offering to send both of us home. Linn was thankful but rejected saying her friend was on the way.

He nodded and I hugged her once before I took my leave. She smiled at me, thanking me for the lovely date before leaving. I got in, sighing softly as I buckled my seat belt.

"All OK?"

"Yea. Its just that she's a lovely girl. I'm just sorry that I cannot return her feelings the way she was hoping."

"You don't like her?"

"I do. As a friend. More than a friend. No."

"Oh.. then the person you like.. is it still the same?"

I nodded, not looking at him but nodded firmly knowing he got my meaning loud and clear. Lam didn't say anything and just drove.

We made small chat and I knew he had plans after this. Just as we got to my dorm, he stopped me.

"I will be done with my stuff by 10pm. Do you want to get supper? Then I thought we can go hang out for a bit or something? I know you like the beach and stars. We could take a drive down?"

I looked at Lam quizzically, wondering why was he being so sweet. I nodded hesitantly, smiling eventually over the proposed plans. Lam smiled at me, touched his hair awkwardly as a coping mechanism as I left the car.

I turned back to see him, promising to see him later at 10ish. He agreed and I told him to drive safe. As I walked back towards my dorm, my heart couldn't stop doing all kinds of funny flips.

ARGH!!!!