A Court of Ice and Fire

Chapter 53

It was dark.

Not the comforting dark of shadows and wisps that were the in-between but suffocating and penetrating. I felt it constricting me and yanking me down...down...down.

Images flashed through the darkness that made my stomach twist—pictures of corpses and death, of blood-soaked hands and unseeing eyes. Pictures that played in circles in my mind, imprinted and never leaving. My mind was a traitor to me, replaying Roma's scream of pain, Adrian's last smile, Liam's charred and burned body.

I could see him, standing in the middle of a blackened field of smoke, watching in pained terror as he collapsed to the ground, unmoving and still. I reached out to touch him, to graze his body with my fingertips, when a flare of sharp pain slithered through my body, and I screamed—

My body jolted up, bile in my throat as I catapulted towards the bathroom. The air was cold and sharp against my clammy skin, and I welcomed the cold draft as hurled my pitiful dinner into the porcelain toilet.

Just a dream. Just a shitty, terrible, dream. I said the words over and over again as wave after wave of nausea hit me, forcing out the contents of my stomach. He's alive. He's alive.

I sagged against the cold tile floor, my breathing short and erratic. His death continued to replay across my mind, and I could feel his heart stopping as if it were my own. I stayed on the ground for hours, trying and failing to banish the images brushing against in my mind, until what little restraint I had snapped.

Fuck it.

Yanking myself off the floor, I staggered to the nearby sink, fumbling with the small faucet before practically shoving my whole head underneath the cold water to cool my skin. The ice water felt like heaven against my cheeks and neck, and I pulled away only when I felt my heart slowing down in my chest.

I barely had to think as I cast out a hand, and a large, shimmering doorway appeared barely a foot away from me. It was second nature for me to step through, ink dipped shadows draping over my body until the rest of the world faded away into a blissful black wave.

The in-between was wonderfully silent and devoid of anything except for the shadows that twirled around at my feet. If it had been a normal venture, I would relish in the silence, but I moved through it quickly, my power flaring in the empty space as it searched for the missing chord I was looking for.

The first time I had come here it was by accident, and I was stuck for what had seemed like days before I managed to find my way out. Now, I could navigate the blank world with ease, allowing my instincts to take control.

I paused when I felt that tug in the pit of my stomach cease, and I closed my eyes and focused on that energy as if felt the world shift. When I opened my eyes again, there was a dim, glimmering window of space in front of me.

With barely half a thought, the window cleared, and the weight on my chest eased just a little when I saw the sleeping male. He was passed out on a bed I didn't recognize, in a room that was completely unfamiliar to me. Just the sight of him struck me down to my soul, and it took every ounce of my self control not to widen that window and step through.

No. He's safe. You'd be putting him in pain if you walked through.

This wasn't healthy, staring at him night after night. It was akin to rubbing salt into a fresh wound, over and over again. But I couldn't stay away. Everytime I had tried, I could feel my body begin to panic, wondering if something had happened or if he was still alive. I could feel my sanity slip away piece by piece until I came here, calming my panic and easing my mind.