Falling (a Heartstopper fanfiction)

Fine

The next weekend, Charlie somewhat reluctantly agreed to go to the cinema with Nick and his rugby friends. Nick had told him Ben and Harry weren't going to be there, and, after how well things had gone with Charlie's friends at the birthday party and the milkshake café, Nick wanted to see if his friends could get along with Charlie, too. He seemed to think that might make it easier for him to come out to them, which Charlie could see, so he was willing to try it. Without Harry around, the rugby lads could be okay.

Still. He was nervous about it. He'd checked his hair probably ten times in the last hour. Not that anyone other than Nick would care what his hair looked like, but he always felt better when he was sure his hair was okay.

Tori appeared in his doorway as he was checking for the eleventh time. "Going somewhere?"

"Jesus, Tori!" He never expected her, which she seemed to enjoy.

"What?"

"How do you just appear out of nowhere?"

"Older sister magic."

Charlie smiled, kneeling down to sort through the shoes in his closet. He didn't know why he bothered, since he always wore the same ones ... but someday he might not.

"Where are you going?" Tori asked.

"Nick's invited me round to the cinema with his friends."

"Oh. Okay."

"What?"

"No. Nothing. Glad Nick's such a nice ... friend."

"Well, yeah. He is. But, um ..." If Elle could know, surely Tori could, too. Charlie was pretty sure Nick wouldn't mind. "Actually, we're ... Me and Nick, we're kind of going out."

"Called it."

"You can't tell anyone, though," he told her. "He's not even out to his mum."

"I know, I know. I'm happy for you. You've liked him for ages."

Chariie yielded to the inevitable and picked up his usual shoes before turning to smile at her. "Thanks."

"You're hanging out with his mates now?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"I've seen them at parties and stuff. They don't seem that nice compared to Nick."

"I'll be fine."

"None of them know about you and Nick?" she asked.

"Obviously not."

"Okay. So, is he your boyfriend?"

Charlie would have loved to have said yes, but he wasn't sure himself. "We're not ready to label it yet," he said instead. "We're just ... you know."

"'You know'," she echoed mockingly.

"Shut up!"

"Well done, though. Your crush on him was super embarrassing."

Charlie couldn't help smiling. "Go away!"

She did, and Charlie checked his hair for the dozenth time. He couldn't help remembering the one time he had said to Ben that they were boyfriends, and the way Ben had shut him down hard, as if the whole concept was horrifying. Nick would never be like that, he told himself, but it was possible that Nick didn't actually think they were boyfriends, and that would be bad enough. No, he wasn't going to ask. It was enough just to be with him.

Charlie's dad drove him to the mall, and was silent most of the way there. His dad was a quiet man, anyway, but Charlie could tell something was bothering him. As they pulled up in the car park, he turned to Charlie. "Pickup at ten, okay?"

"Yep."

"Charlie."

"Yeah?"

"If any of those boys says anything, does anything nasty, you just call me, okay?"

Charlie realised he had never really been able to explain to his dad what had happened at Harry's party, and what with everything last year, it was only reasonable for his dad to worry. He smiled reassuringly. "Nick's going to be there. I'll be fine."

He got out of the car. Nick was waiting just outside the door, and his smile put any concerns Charlie might have had to rest. They hugged, hard. Charlie had spent most of the afternoon at Nick's yesterday, but it seemed like they hadn't seen each other in forever. It always felt that way.

But as they walked through the mall and got onto the escalator, Charlie grew more anxious. Despite his assurances to his dad and Tori, he was far from certain that this was a good idea. He turned to Nick. "Um, are you sure your friends are going to be okay with me being here?"

"Yeah, of course. You'll be fine. Ben and Harry aren't coming. What, are you nervous?"

"I don't know. They all probably think I'm this, like, gay nerd."

Nick smiled at him reassuringly. "Well, you kind of are a gay nerd."

"Shut up ... rugby lad."

They both laughed, and Nick kept up his usual stream of chatter as they made their way to the cinema. Every time they were apart, he seemed to save up everything he wanted to say to tell Charlie the next time they saw each other. Which Charlie didn't mind, because he loved talking to Nick about pretty much anything.

Then they arrived in the cinema, and despite what Nick had said, the first person Charlie saw was Harry ... and the second was Ben.

Harry immediately made some comment, and the rest of the boys laughed. Charlie took a deep breath, trying to be okay. This was important to Nick, he knew. If they had any hope of ever being able to be openly together, Charlie was going to have to find a way to be able to spend time with Nick's friends. It wasn't fair otherwise; and Nick would never be able to come out to them if he thought they were going to treat him the way Harry treated Charlie.

"They said they weren't coming," Nick told him. "Do you—we can leave, if you want."

"No. It's okay. I can't avoid them forever."

"You sure?" Nick's eyes searched his face, and Charlie pretended to feel as okay as he said he did.

"Yeah. I'll be fine."