Falling (a Heartstopper fanfiction)

Good

Charlie went to Nick's the next day, after going home to change and assure his parents that he was finishing his work first. He finished some of it, but the rest could wait. Nick, on the other hand, couldn't. He had been blowing up Charlie's phone asking when he was coming over.

They went straight to Nick's room, of course, kissing, of course. Then, while Nick went downstairs to feed Nellie, Charlie grabbed Nick's phone and started scrolling through his pictures.

"Oh, don't look at those," Nick groaned, coming back in and sitting down next to Charlie on the floor. "Here, budge up."

"No." Charlie wasn't about to give up ownership of the beanbag chair. It was comfy. "I was here first."

"Um, really?"

"Yeah."

"We're in my room."

"I was here first," Charlie repeated stubbornly, shoving Nick to the side.

Nick's mouth opened in outrage, and he shook his head. "Oh, no. This is war." He launched himself at Charlie, finding all the ticklish spots he knew of.

"No! Stop tickling me! Stop it!" Charlie managed through his giggles.

And in the next instant Nick was kissing him, pressing him back into the chair. Charlie kissed back, feeling as always so warm and safe in Nick's presence, in Nick's arms.

They lay back eventually, Nick's head on Charlie's shoulder. "I like being boyfriends," Nick said softly.

"Me, too."

"Let's just spend every afternoon like this."

"Mm. I wish we could." Charlie sighed. "I've got the Paris trip coming up in a couple of weeks."

"Are you going on that?" Nick lifted his head to look at Charlie. "But you don't take French."

"Yes, but Tao and Elle both do, and once they were going ..." Charlie shrugged. Then he had a brilliant idea. "But I think there's still room." He held his breath, waiting for Nick's reaction.

"The two of us, in Paris? Like an extended date?"

Well, that sounded magical. If you didn't consider the other people who would be with them. "Something like that."

"That does sound nice. I'll talk to my mum, but I'm sure she'll let me go." Nick sat up suddenly, fixing his hair the way he did when he was nervous, looking away from Charlie.

Alarm filled him. "You don't have to. It was probably a stupid idea."

"No, I want to," Nick said, his hand closing on Charlie's reassuringly.

"Good."

*****

The next day, Nick came over to Charlie's after school. Seeing him there on the doorstep, his eyes lighting up as soon as the door opened, Charlie couldn't believe this was real.

And he tried to focus on homework. He really did. They lay on his floor, Nick on his phone and Charlie reading his book. But then after a while Nick put his phone down, and he lay there reading over Charlie's shoulder. When he kissed Charlie on the cheek, any pretense of actually reading the book went away, and Charlie rolled over to kiss his boyfriend, reveling in the idea that he could just ... do that.

When the kiss ended, they looked into each other's eyes for a long time. Which, when you thought about it, seemed like it should be awkward, but somehow it never was.

"It was nice of your mum to have me over," Charlie said at last.

"She likes you. And she thinks you're good for me."

Grinning impishly, Charlie said, "Too good for you, maybe."

But Nick wasn't grinning when he said, "Probably so," and that made Charlie murmur in distress and kiss him again.

This time, when they pulled apart, Nick sighed. "I don't think your mum thinks I'm good for you."

"They don't think anyone's good for me. It took them a year to be okay with Tao."

"You can tell them if you want, you know. I don't mind."

"I know. I told Tori."

Nick did grin at that. "I know. She glares at me differently now than she used to."

"Progress."

"Exactly."

"I had a dream that I told my parents," Charlie said wistfully. "And they were okay with it. But ... I don't know. Not because it's you, but—well, anyone, really. They don't want me distracted from my studies."

"I'm not distracting."

At that patent ridiculousness, Charlie lifted the neglected book. "Really?"

"Really. Read it to me." And Nick snuggled in with his head on Charlie's shoulder.

*****

Nick was at Charlie's again, the two of them without even having to talk about it lying down on Charlie's bed to kiss the moment they got into the room.

Resting his head on Charlie's shoulder, Nick sighed. "I'm sorry."

"You're not supposed to say that," Charlie reminded him. "And why now?"

"I meant to make more progress coming out this week. After the Sports Day thing, it should have been so easy, but somehow ..."

Charlie reached for Nick's hand, lacing their fingers together. "Don't stress about it. Wait until it feels natural."

"And if it never does?"

"It will." At least, Charlie assumed it would. He'd never had a "coming out", so it was hard to know.

"I'm going to tell some people, at least. Soon."

"Okay." Charlie smiled at his boyfriend's earnestness, and kissed him again.

Reluctantly, Nick had to go. His own coursework beckoned, his mum had dinner ready, and Charlie's parents were home and not thrilled that Nick was at the house again.

They came down the stairs from Charlie's room and Nick opened the door. But then he turned, the two of them standing there in the open door looking at one another.

Charlie reached his hand out, brushing Nick's fingers, feeling the electricity between them. It always felt that way, when they touched, like every nerve in his body was alive and awake.

Nick's eyes darkened, and he looked down at Charlie's mouth in that familiar "I want to kiss you" look that cut off Charlie's breathing.

But they were standing in the open doorway. Charlie's parents could see, Charlie's neighbours could see.

Quickly, before he could think better of it, Charlie broke the contact of their hands and stepped away, smiling. "Go on, then."

Nick laughed, turning away and heading down the walk. He stopped once he reached the sidewalk, turning to wave.

Charlie waved back, wishing he didn't have to go. Wondering what it would be like if they never had to say good-bye. Then he shut the door and went back upstairs to work on his maths.