Chapter 12 - Personal Struggles

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As I continued my walk around High Camp, my mind was still clouded with thoughts of Spider and the RDA. It had been a constant struggle to keep myself from dwelling on these heavy emotions ever since letting him be taken away. I knew that I needed to focus on something else, something that would help me take my mind off of the fact I blamed myself for everything.

I decided to head towards the communal cooking area, hoping to find some human edible food to quiet the growling in my stomach, having last eaten before leaving for the regrettable trip. As I entered the area, I noticed a group of teenagers around my age huddled around a fire, cooking what looked like some kind of meat, maybe Yerik but I was too far away to know and quite frankly didn't care enough to risk being insulted for absolutely no reason. I'm sure the smell was nice, but sadly I wasn't able to know due to my exopack filtering smells out.

I scratched my dread-covered scalp, looking around, searching for any signs of food the scientists stored. This alone was enough to show that I rarely visited communal dinners, most people didn't want me there anyways so why enlarge the grudge by inviting me to a round of glares everything my breather pack compressed to hold onto my face? Catching myself monologuing in my head I began my search for something nice.

As I made my way around the site with no further complications, I noticed one of the scientists sitting alone by herself, staring off into space. Why she was out and about sitting around here was a mystery to me. She looked lost in thought, and for some reason, I felt that she knew exactly how to fix my problem, hence I walked toward her and sat down to start up a conversation.

"Hey." I said, trying to get her attention, which seemed to work as she flinched for a moment before realizing someone wanted something from her. Surprise was the emotion written across her face, obviously not expecting me to randomly sit next to her.

"Can I do something for you?" She said whilst unconsciously putting her hair behind her ear. I let my eyes wander for a moment. Maybe this short pause would make me seem mysterious, but I mostly just did it to think of how to ask for food.

"Do you know where I can find some food?" She blinked, the gears processing the unusual question in her brown-haired head. She closed her mouth for a second before closing it again.

"The cafeteria?" She answered unsure of herself. That makes sense, maybe passing out so much has finally started having its effect on my memory. "Where else?" was the follow-up question directed at me. Now it was my turn to process her words. Was that a rhetorical question? I obviously didn't know where else, that's why I had asked in the first place... Oh well.

"I don't know..." I said still a little confused by the older woman in front of me. I snorted at the situation. The female scientist now turned her head in her own confusion, still looking into my eyes.

"Are you okay? You are acting a little bit strange." I leaned back in fake shock.

"I have no idea what you are talking about. Anyways-" I stood up in an instant. My dreaded hair fell over my exopack, obscuring the view, before being shoved out of the way by my hand. "Thanks for the advice." I looked back at her, only to see her eyes still locked on my face. A mix of confusion and a loss for words described her expression the best. In the next few seconds, she seemed to try and say something but held back and just shook her head sighing to herself.

"You're welcome, Firin." I nodded with a small smile and made my way back to the laboratory to quench my hunger, which was slowly getting my attention by cramping up my stomach now. With a mental command for it to stop not working I hurried my steps toward my target. Unfortunately, fate did have other plans for the moment as an unpleasant voice I had almost forgotten made its way into my ears.

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