Nakatulala ako sa kisame. Alasdose ng madaling araw.
Third year sucks. Ang daming pinagagawa. Plus the fact na bother ako sa status namin ni Worth. At nangangamusta si Lolo. The latter seems fine but how can I smile to him if I have these burdens? Ang hirap magpanggap.
In the first place, it's my fault.
Sa tuwing sisisihin ko ang sarili lagi kong naalala ang mga sinasabi ni Worth. And how he made me feel valued. That I shouldn't feel bad at things for long, be reflective, love that Aya.
Pero sa nagawa ko to get him? How can I stupidly love myself anymore. And the biggest nightmare is what if he'll find out?
"Aaaarghhhh!" Ginulo ko ang buhok at agad na umupo sa kama. Napabuntong hininga ako kasabay ng pagtunog ng cellphone ko. Agad ko itong hinanap sa nagkalat kong mga reviewer.
Natigilan ako ng makita si Worth na tumatawag. Natataranta ko itong sinagot.
"Worth," pabuling kong tawag dahil gabi na.
[What are you thinking? Maybe doing at this time?] He sounds sleepy.
"Ahm. N-nagrereview! May mga exams kami bukas. Ikaw, bakit gising ka pa?"
[Well, I was sleeping. I don't know why I woke up. Nasamid ako ng uminom ako ng tubig ngayon-ngayon lang. As if someone's thinking about me. I checked my phone and saw you're online.]
Napangiti ako, "I don't know that's true."
[So you're thinking about me, huh.]
"Bawal ba?"
[Who says?]
"Wala." I smile. "Sige na, matulog ka na ulit. Hindi na muna kita iisipin."
[I wonder if you can still review properly, Miss Dimatinag.]
Mahina akong natawa, "Yes, Sir Zarmiago. Sa kabila ng pag-iisip ko sa 'yo nagagawa ko pang mag-aral."
[You think it's better if I am with you while you're reviewing?] he said that with a pinch of seduction.
"That's the best idea. But I won't be needing you here."
[You wanna hurt me, won't you?]
Napalakas ang tawa ko, "You're the sweetest distraction I have, Worth. Alam mo ba 'yon? And I wanted to be distracted forever!"
[Is that a yes?]
"A yes?" I frown.
[A yes. That I'll be there in a few minutes if that's really a yes.]
"Wait, no! It's midnight. Saka andito si Shemia. At maaga ka bukas sa trabaho."
He didn't say anything but I feel like he's smiling. I smile and fron unconsciously.
"Are you smiling?"
[Yes... I am really happy, Aya. I imagine your voice being with for the rest of my life. My mornings, my afternoons, evenings. Everytime that we'll have a chance. Gusto kong masanay sa boses mo na hahanap-hanapin ko, ayaw kong mawala at iiyakan ko kapag hindi ko maririnig...]
"Worth..." My smile dropped.
[I want to tell you a secret, Aya...]
"Hmm. Ano 'yon?"
Narinig ko siyang humikab at humiga. Saka niya binuksan ng video sa call at tinapat sa mukha niya. Hindi ko maiwasang mapatitig sa kanya. He looks tired yet handsome. The lines above his sleepy eyes that seems shining. His messy hair. The muscles in his face...
