Get On Your Knees and Pray to me By Shining Loki On AO3

Chapter 32 - Sorrow, Sadness, And Sacrifice

Summary:

Gretchen has taken you. With a gun to your back, you have nowhere to run, nothing you can do. She plans on sacrificing you to Loki. It seems this is the end. It's time to say goodbye.

TW: topics such as gun violence, violence, blood, death, murder, etc...

Notes:

Happy Friday!! Alright, are we ready?? I know it's been a long week, but it's finally here. Thank you for reading and enjoy, my dears

(See the end of the chapter for .)

Chapter Text

Just keep your head up. Stay calm. Breathe. Stay alive.

It was the mantra you continued to repeat to yourself in your head as Gretchen walked you to her apartment. She was humming and although there was an innocent smile on her face, you could still feel the malicious grip of her hands and the steel of the gun pressed against you. You breathed through your nose, staring ahead of you and hoping that everything would be alright.

Just keep your head up. Stay calm. Breathe. Stay alive.

Stay alive. It was a weird thought. You never thought you'd have to worry about dying, really. It seemed so far away in the grand scheme of things. And when Loki was around - when he used to be around - you felt like there were thousands of shields erected around you at all times. It seemed like he had ensured that nothing in the world could possibly hurt you, no matter how much they tried.

But Loki wasn't around. So that wasn't the case anymore.

Just keep your head up. Stay calm. Breathe. Stay alive.

Gretchen said she wanted to sacrifice you - you still didn't know what that meant. If it was anything like the movies, the tales, or whatever was swimming in your head, it wouldn't be pretty. It wouldn't end with you alive. It would end with you cold, lifeless, dead.

Stay alive. Stay alive. Stay alive.

Your body moved on its own accord, your mind doing nothing to aid you. The only things you could process were that a gun was pressed to you and that you were completely and utterly alone. Cooper was at home, right where you told him to stay. But right now, you'd do anything to bury your fingers in that thick fur of his. He was safer where he was. You just hoped someone would take care of him if you were gone.

And then, there was Loki. The man who vowed to protect you from everything bad in this universe. The man who swore he would love you until he withered and died - and even after that, he proclaimed his love would carry on. The man who made you feel like you were worth something, like you were whole.

The man who left you.

He wasn't here to save you. You had to figure out how to save yourself. It was ironic, actually, that your life was going to end in order to summon Loki, the one person in your life who swore to never leave you. If it worked and your death brought him back, you wished you could see him one last time before you died. Because truthfully, even through all of this depression and decay, all you wanted was Loki.

All you wanted was to see him again, to laugh with him and love him. You wanted his arms around you, his lips on yours, his hands on your face. You wanted to feel his breathing and touch his hair and taste his tongue. You wanted him over you, under you, inside of you. You wanted him everywhere.

Because you loved him.

You loved him and you were going to die because of him.

No, stay alive. You need to stay alive!