Lava | Ninjago

🜂 | you left me bleeding

Kai was lying on his stomach, clutching Cole's hand in his. Over the cliff's edge, he could still see Cole's terrified eyes. He could feel the tears burning in his own as he was trying to hold him but he just knew he couldn't hold on for much longer. He had to get him back on steady ground but how?

"Kai! I'm slipping!" Cole's voice was followed by the rest of his team.

"Kai, do something!"

"Pull him up, Kai!"

"C'mon, Kai! He's gonna fall!"

Where were they coming from, he couldn't tell. He heard them everywhere and he wanted to scream because for fucks sake he was holding him with all he got! Why won't they, when they are so smart, help him?

"Kai, please don't let me go." All he saw were tears. His and Cole's. It was breaking his heart but all he felt was his body slowly giving up on him. Never in a million years will he be strong enough to save Cole who was giving all his hopes into him. He was hanging at the edge of death and Kai wasn't strong enough. All those feelings were only making matters worse too, it was a cursed circle.

"Do something!"

"Stop stalling, Kai!"

He panted which almost turned into a sob he was trying to hold in. His arms were shaking. He could feel his own body slightly slipping towards the edge. And he could feel Cole's hand slowly slipping from his grasp. If only he could stop sweating. If only he could stop this all, put an end to this. If only he could save him.

"Hold on, Cole, I got you, I promise I got you," he got out, his voice quivering. He took a deep breath and tried to pull Cole up a little while sliding back away from the edge.

"Hurry up, Kai!"

"Quit crying and pull him up!"

"You're almost there!"

He pulled again but his muscles were too weak. He fought their resistance as he tried to get Cole up. Years of training, hours spent working on his muscles and they still weren't enough. He wasn't enough. Would he ever be? Could he ever be?

Cole's hand was becoming more slippery every second. In front of his eyes, he could see him falling again. He blinked and tried to pull again.

"What are you waiting for, Kai?" He flinched, not expecting the voice to be so close to his ear. But the moment he did, he could feel Cole's hand slipping from his own.

"No!"

He looked over the edge to see Cole falling down down down into the void below them. His expression was terrified, almost tearful, but especially betrayed.

"Kai!" he screamed before he disappeared. He gave him a promise and that promise was now as broken as Cole's body was about to be once he reaches the end of the fall. And all Kai did was helplessly lie there, staring at the void that swallowed him. That took Cole away form him.

But it was his own fault.

He failed.

"No..." sobbed Kai. He put his head down on the ground, letting the tears get away just how he let Cole get away. He took a shaky breath. "Cole..."

"Great job, Kai." He turned and saw all of his friends standing above him, their faces wet and red from tears but their expressions full of anger. Fury written all over their heartbroken eyes. Had he not been the master of fire, he would believe they were about to burn him alive. Maybe that's what he deserved for inflicting pain on every single one of them. For letting their teammate die. Their brother. The one he swore he loved.

Maybe he deserved to burn eternally.

"You just killed our friend."

"What did he do to you?"

Kai looked over all of them. As much as he hated himself, he couldn't help but feel a little betrayed himself. They were all just standing there. Why didn't anyone do something? Why did they all put their trust in him when everyone knew he was the biggest failure in all the realms? "I didn't- I tried!" He didn't mean for his words to come out in a roar but they did. His voice echoed all around the deserted place, all around his mind. It was so loud and constant like a resonance and it hurt. Dear master, it hurt.

"But you failed. You failed us. You failed Cole. Isn't that right, Cole?"

And suddenly there he was. Standing next to them, arms crossed. His gi didn't show any signs of damage – quite the opposite, it was perfectly clean. Kai felt so small under his gaze. The burning gaze filled with so many feelings. Hatred, disappointment (which he never will not be), betrayal, heartbreak... He looked majestic, so tall and strong. It would take barely any effort for him to just squish Kai like some sort of an ant.

He was perfect and it was all Kai's fault that it was all gone. He deserved to be hated. He deserved to be rid of everything he fought so hard to achieve. Love, family, respect, his powers. What good was a ninja that couldn't save others? He was useless. Always in the way, unhelpful. A burden.

Kai shook - but he wasn't sure whether it was from fear, the sobs he was fighting, or the exhaustion he was just experiencing. Maybe it was all at once. Maybe his own body desired to get rid of him.

"You broke your promise, Kai."

He flinched and his eyes snapped open. He could feel his pyjamas sticking to his body just like his hair. He felt so heavy and exhausted, his body was trembling and tears were stinging his eyes again. All around him was dark but slowly his eyes got used to the lack of light. He panted as he looked around through all the water blur.

He was in his room. It was just a dream. Just a dream. He was in his room and it was just a dream. Was it just a dream?

As he rushed to get up, he got tangled up in his blanket a bit but managed to get out after some more frantic squirming. His hands shook as he looked around the familiar space. He felt like he was going to be sick or maybe he was about to pass out, it was really hard to tell.

He had to make sure.

He ran out of his room, not even trying to be quiet. He had to see. He had to make sure otherwise he was going to collapse and die for sure.

And then he got to the door and he finally slowed down as his breath quivered once more. Kai opened the door and entered the room. There, on the bed, he could see a silhouette. He rushed towards it and shook the sleeping body in despearation. Air was leaving his lungs but none was coming in.

"Cole. Cole, please wake up. Cole. Wake up. Please," he whispered as more sobs came to the fight. "Cole..."

"Kai?" he heard a sleepy voice slur out. It was as if a weight was lifted from his shoulders but then dropped on him again. He dropped to his knees as he somehow hugged him. The pose was not comfortable at all but there was simply no strength left in him. He was defeated, breathless and shivering from all sorts of feelings.

"Thank the FSM. Oh, thank master you're still here. You're here. Good." He sobbed into his chest, unable to hold back anymore. The sobs and tears were having a ball. Cole raised his head from the pillow and watched him in confusion, still slow from waking up from his midnight slumber just a few seconds ago.

"What happened?" he asked him carefully.

"I let you down. I broke my promise. I'm sorry, it won't happen again. I won't let you fall again. I'm so sorry Cole. I really am. Please, forgive me."

The realization hit him. he slowly raised into a sitting position and held Kai–the broken pile of misery and guilt–close. It didn't seem that Kai had enough energy left to keep holding onto him, his arms were weakly laying there, as if all the exertion he experienced in the cursed dreamland was real.

Cole was still half-asleep, his mind still needed some time to work properly but he gained some practice over time. It was unfortunate. "Was it the nightmare again?" he whispered. Kai nodded, his hair wet with sweat brushing against Cole's pyjamas.

"It won't let me go," he sobbed into the night.