Fuck It I Love You

23

Jane

I saw the hesitation in his eyes before he finally caved in and got into the bed with me.

But I honestly couldn't care less.

We're at opposite ends of the bed, the only thing illuminating the room is the moon shining through the window on my side. I stare at the ceiling for a while, before he breaks the silence.

"Did you have fun today?" He whispered, and I turned on my side so I could look at him. I smile widely and nod. "That's good."

"That wine was disgusting." I grimace but I see him smile and fight back a laugh.

"It wasn't. You just don't have an acquired taste." We fall silent again and I shuffle closer to him.

"Thank you." He looks into my eyes and tilts his head.

"You've said that." I roll my eyes and punch him in the bicep.

"No, but like, seriously, thank you." I whisper. He hums in response and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear.

"You ate the last bit of cheesecake though." He says seriously and I roll my eyes and begin to turn away, but he grabs my wrist and pulls me back so that I'm flush against him. He rubs my face with his hands affectionately as he stares at me.

"It just tasted too good." I say quietly, and he traces my lips with his thumb.

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah." I say breathlessly and he leans in closer, and his lips hover over mine.

"If I kiss you, Jane..." I shake my head and place my hand on his neck.

"Please." He doesn't move for a moment, but then his lips press into mine softly. It's a featherlight kiss, nothing at all like the one we shared in France, but this one had equally more impact. His hands travel down my body and stop at my hips, his fingers digging into them. He pulls away for a moment and mutters "fuck" underneath his breath before kissing me again with urgency. I rake a hand through his hair and arch my back, in need of more contact. His hands travel back up to my neck and he grabs me softly, causing me to gasp. As soon as my mouth opens, his tongue dives in in search of mine, and when they connect he seems to snap.

He hooks my leg around his waist and turns me on my back, making him have full control. His fingers graze my thighs before he grabs my knee and lifts it up before deliciously pressing into me. He groans in pleasure and disconnects his lips from mine so he can kiss and lick my neck.

"You have no idea-" he kisses me passionately on the lips. "How many times I have thought of this, buttercup." He kisses me again before I can respond, and then I hook my legs around his waist, pulling him against me so I can feel him again. I grind up against him, causing us both to groan. He kisses me roughly again and I flip us so that I'm straddling him. He sits up and grabs the back of my thighs and pulls me flush against him, causing me to grind against him again. I moan and grip the hairs on the nape of his neck as he kisses up my jaw.

"Joseph?" He mumbles in response, rolling us over so that he's on top of me again, he gives me one last kiss before rolling off me.

"We're not having sex. Yet."

I feel like he's knocked the wind out of me.

He pulls me towards him and wraps my arms and legs around him, and I bury my face in his neck.

"Why?" My voice is muffled against his skin, and I feel the vibration of his chuckle.

"As much as I want to, Jane, I want you to be sure." I squirm against him in an attempt to release myself from his grip, but he tightens his hold and rolls us over so he's practically flattening me. I eventually give up and place a hand in his hair.