Sinking || hyunlix

1

Felix's hands shake as he waits for Chris at the airport. He's numb. Felix doesn't feel anything right now but all-consuming grief. He's silently choking on it, wishing for some outlet or relief. His thoughts are plagued with the same word on repeat; dead. The word swallows his brain and eats away at his thoughts—leaving Felix feeling nothing but devastation in its wake.

Felix pulls up Google, on his phone, as he waits and types in 'How to stop feeling grief?' Several articles pop up and so does a Reddit option. He clicks on the Reddit and reads all the responses. Comment after comment says the same thing. Sex, drugs, and alcohol.

Felix doesn't do drugs. He's not much of a drinker, either but maybe he can learn. If it can numb his pain, then he's willing to try anything. Then there is sex. Felix is a blushing virgin but Felix isn't the same Felix anymore. He's hurt and in pain. If sex can ease that pain, then why not? Besides, Felix will be moving to Korea soon, and in Korea is Hyunjin.

The alpha Felix has been admiring since Chan started posting about stray kids in the first place. While, the two have never talked, nor met, Felix has seen Hyunjin grow into an amazing alpha and Felix's omega longs to meet the alpha one day. So, yes, maybe—just maybe, if it's with that alpha then Felix can forget all this pain completely. Even if just for a brief moment.

*Ding* A notification to his phone brings him out of his stunned daze. He blinks at the text message and sees Chris is waiting outside his terminal at the airport. Felix blinks and knows damn well he shouldn't be driving but here he is.

He pulls up and sees a guy wearing a Givenchy hoodie with glasses and a guard. Felix knows it's Chris without even seeing his face. Felix beeps and Chris starts as he rushes up to the car. His guard places the suitcase in the boot of the car before opening the door for Chris to get in; him getting in as well. While Chris takes the front seat, his guard takes the back.

Chris knows Felix, so he doesn't say anything. He merely grabs Felix's hand and Felix drives off; trying to contain what little emotion he has left. Something other than grief.

"You got taller," Chris comments. He doesn't say 'sorry' or 'how are you' both dumb statements and will only proceed to set Felix off.

Felix and Chris grew up together in Australia. Chris is the one who taught Felix Korean, and to embrace his Korean heritage. While Felix still isn't used to the name Yongbok, he now tolerates it because of Chris. Chris's family was Felix's family and vice versa. Things changed when Chris decided he wanted to be an idol and left for Korea at the age of 12—while Felix was just 10. Chris changed his name to his last name and started going by Chan.

At first, the two talked daily. But then it turned to weekly, monthly, yearly birthdays, and eventually; not at all. Felix saw his once best friend on television—doing promotions, tours, and concerts. He felt both happy and abandoned all at the same time. It was not until a week ago, when something so devastating happened, that Felix got the courage to reach out to Chris again.

Felix always believes in giving people space but he needed Chris—he needs Chris. So, Felix got on social media and sent as many messages as he could and finally got a response from their 3racha account on Instagram. The two exchanged contact information, and Felix proceeded to explain to Chris he needed his best friend because something terrible happened to Felix's parents.

Felix wasn't able to get the words out but based on the tears, Chan got the hint. Felix hasn't been able to admit it out loud yet. He doesn't want to because that makes it real. For his own sanity, he can't allow it to be real. He's already on the verge of shutting down, completely.

Felix looks at Chan and snorts.

"You barely grew," Felix teases. He just wants some semblance of normalcy. "Pretty short for an alpha."