It Will All Work Out (Intersex gxg)

Chapter 24

Shay's POV

Hearing Amber say that she didn't like penises when the girls were teasing her was hardly surprising, and yet it cut me deep, which was just what my bitch of a sister and her friends had intended. I hated hearing it though, and I guess it made me give up on anything happening between us, since it wasn't like I could remove my extra attachment. I knew I should have talked to her, even afterwards, but I was hurting too much to even try. It just seemed that all the plans I'd had for her and I in the future disappeared in that instant. 

And yeah, each of the girls may have gotten yelled at, but they didn't seem to care, they were happy to make me miserable. Besides, yelling didn't mean a thing to them, they only responded to punching, which I may have done later.

And then I went and made Amber upset, because I couldn't bear to be near her, so I avoided her. I knew it was a shitty thing to do, but I did it anyway because it took everything in my power not to cry when I saw her. The bike rides were the hardest, because I couldn't risk her catching up to me, so it was a nice option when Gail offered to drive me to work.

Gail had been one of my classmates, and she had also been one of the girls that stopped by the lunch table to hit on me before I suggested to Amber that we pretend that she and I date. But Gail was also the only one that somehow knew that I was intersex, and it still didn't stop her from hitting on me when she came in with her car for an oil change a little before the 4th of July party.

I'd turned her down yet again, and then she came back a few days after the 4th with her mom's car. I probably should have said no, I really wasn't interested, but I was still hurting from hearing Ambers thoughts on penises, and she was the first person to show an interest in me with the knowledge that I was built differently.

From then on, she drove me to and from work, and every day on my lunch break she'd come by, and we'd make out in her front seat. We didn't go any further than that and some touching through clothes, I guess it was enough for me to feel wanted and not hated. No, the kisses weren't nearly as nice as the one I shared with Amber, but with Amber not an option I guess I was just out for a distraction.

When my birthday hit, I was feeling worse than ever. I hadn't spoken to Amber in over a week, even ignoring her emails, and I really missed her. It was my own fault though, because I was the one doing the avoiding and ignoring, but I didn't know how to repair something that I did to myself. Would she ever forgive me?

You could tell that the kissing wasn't great when those were the thoughts that were running through my head while I had my tongue in Gail's mouth and my hand over her tee shirt clad breasts. When my break was over, I went back inside, where Nick grunted at me, sliding over an envelope and a cup of pink liquid. It was a birthday card and a cup of melted ice cream. I looked blankly at them for a moment before I looked back up at him, dread crawling up my spine.

"Where did this come from?" I started to feel nauseous and knew what he was going to say before he opened his mouth.

"Your friend stopped by. I sent her out to the parking lot, but I guess she missed you. The ice cream is a waste now though." He was looking over the computer at the open work orders, not realizing the pain his words had just inflicted on me. Well, really, it was more that I'd inflicted the pain on Amber, and he just told me how much I'd probably crushed her. Because there was little doubt that she'd seen me with Gail, and then left the birthday card and treat for me instead of staying to watch more of what no doubt was something she didn't want to see.