11| Naraazgi

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10 Days Later.

FAHAD
The clock struck 3 am. I quietly entered the room carrying an important file in my hand, exhausted from another grueling day at work. The weight of the responsibilities seemed to bear down on my shoulders. I kept the file on the table and loosened my tie letting out a deep sigh.I took of my jacket, tossing it on to a chair nearby.
The room was dimly lit, and the only sound that filled the air was the gentle rhythm of Laiba, in her sleep.
I remember her calling me in the evening to ask why I was late and I told her I couldn't make it for dinner.
It's crazy how few weeks back I didn't care about any of this. But now I have a person to call mine and to whom I'm answerable. My person.

I walked towards her trying to keep my steps noiseless. I stood there looking at her for a while because it gave me solace.
I couldn't resist the urge to gently caress her hair while she's asleep.

She stirred a little from it and I quickly backed off.
'tum aa gaye?' She murmered sleepily.
Haa.., I replied unbuttoning my shirt.
'I'm sorry maine tumhe neend se utha diya..'

She looked at the clock.
'3 Baje??!!!!!'
'Itni jaldi kyun aa gaye? Nahi subah hi aa jate!'

'Bohot kaam tha yaar main itna thak gaya hun or..bhook bhi lagi hai'

'Sehri ka time hogya hai' she said waking up from the bed.
'Main kuch banake laati hun tumhare liye..tum fresh hojao..'
I nodded. I know she often showed her frustration towards me and this marriage but I couldn't deny that deep down she does have concern for me.

************************************
LAIBA
I kept the plates after sehri and thought of making Fahad a cup of green tea.
He was so stressed out so this might relieve him.

[ROOM]
'Fahad, I called him out holding two cups in my hand only to see him sound asleep on the bed. He was too tired. So I didn't feel like waking him up.
I decided to retreat and take it back to the kitchen.
As I turned back my foot hit the edge of the table, causing a sharp pain in my toe making me lose balance. I realised the cups of tea had spill all over Fahad's office files. I quickly picked it up and tried to clear the mess.
I tried to dab the wet pages hoping to salvage them. But the damage was done. So I just decided to apologise to him in the morning.

.........................................

[MORNING]

Laiba!!! Laiba utho!! I heard Fahad.

'Yeh tumne kiya hai!!??' He asked pointing towards the papers.

'Fahad..woh kal raat mein tumhare liye green tea layi thi aur woh galti se gir gaya..' I stammered.

Tumhe andaza bhi hai yeh papers kitne important the?! He shouted.
How could you be so irresponsible!

I'm sorry! I said offended.
'Maine jaan boojh kar nahi giraya!'

'Kise pata..jaan boojh kar hi giraya hoga! Mujhse badla lene ke liye. Aakhir shadi ke pehle din se yahi toh keh rahi ho tum??!'

Tumhe lagta hai maine yeh jaan boojh kar kiya hai?
Ek toh maine tumhare liye green tea banayi! Aur tum mujhpe hi chilla rahe ho?
I protested. My voice quivering with hurt.

Oh please just stop!!!  He shouted again.
Ab kya karu mein? He said frustratedly leaving from there.
My eyes welled up with tears. How could he shout at me like that?

[OFFICE]
FAHAD
I sat in my office, deep in thought. I glanced at the pile of papers stained with tea, a reminder of the incident that happened this morning.
Did I overreact at her? The harsh words I shouted at Laiba still echo in my mind, and I can't help but wonder how I let my frustration get the best of me. I hate myself for hurting her. I can still see her face welled up with tears when I left. I took my phone to call her.

LAIBA
I stared at the phone buzzing persistently. I didn't want to talk to him. I reached for my phone and called Amma..I just really wanted her.
My anticipation grew as the phone kept ringing..
'Hello. Laiba? Meri bacchi kaisi ho?'
Her voice made me well up with tears. I miss her so much. I want to go home. I just really want to go home. But I'm also angry with her. I knew if I spoke anything she'd know I'm crying. So I cut the call.

But I needed to talk to someone.
I decided to call bhabhi..
'Hello, Laiba kaisi ho?'
'Main theek hoon bhabhi' apki..tabyat ka puchne ke liye phone kiya..

'Main theek hun..lekin tum mujhe theek nahi lag rahi.
Laiba, tumhari awaaz kafi dull hai. Kuch hua hai kya?'

'Nahi bhabhi..I just miss you so much..' I said controlling my voice.
'Main aapse baad mein baat karti hun' I said and cut the call because if I spoke any longer I wouldn't be able to handle it

FAHAD
'Sir!' There was a knock at the door.
'Woh aaj ki meeting..'

'Cancel it' I told Saba.
'Sir but it's important..'

'I said cancel it!'

'Suna nahi Saba? Aaj sir ke saare meetings cancel kardo. Kyunki uska yaar aaya hai!'
I turned to look at Aman standing. Saba leaves from there.

'Kya hua yaar. Kis soch mein dooba hua hai?' He asked as he sat infront of me.

'Tum Dubai se kab aaye?'
'Bas kal raat..'Tu woh sab chod..mujhe tumse kuch baat karni..

Meri maa meri shadi karwana chahti hai..

Haan toh? Tu bhi toh yahi chahta hai..?
I replied.

Mujhe ek ladki pasand hai..
'Toh tum uske baare mein apni maa ko batao' I replied

'Unse milwane se pehle mujhe tujhse baat karni hai yaar..Kyunki tum uss ladki ko jaante ho.'

Main janta hun? Kon?

Sana.
Sana? I asked in disbelief.
Tumhari cousin!! Sana. He replied.

'Yeh kab hua?'

Oh yaar bohot pehle se.Main bas yeh chahta hun ke tu apne ghar mein ek baar baat karle taki main mama ke saath rishta lekar aaun..
Also tumhe usse mujhse milwane padega..kahin bahir.

I didn't know what to say. I don't know if Sana would agree to this. Because until last month all she wanted was to marry me. But I decided to talk to her about this when the time is right.

[EVENING]
FAHAD
I entered the room and looked around eagerly hoping to find Laiba. But she wasn't there.
'Laiba?' I called out but there was no response.
Only her dupatta was kept on the bed.

I heard the washroom door open and turned to see her come out.
She came towards the bed ignoring me.

Laiba.. I called.
She picked her dupatta from the bed wore it in anger and made her way out of the room and I extended my hand blocking her way.

Laiba!! I said.
She stopped and looked at me.
Main tumse baat karna chahta hoon.
She brushed my hand aside and left from there.
I feel terrible. Ab kaise manau mein ussey?

....................................
Na maaregi deewangi meri
Na maaregi awaargi meri
Ki maaregi zyada mujhe maut se
Naraazgi teri

Kyun itna huaa hai tu khafa?
Hai zidd kis baat ki teri?
Ki maaregi zyada mujhe maut se
Naraazgi teri.
[JAAN NISAAR]

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