Preface

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Before you start the story, here are a few notes about me, the author, that hopefully will help you understand my fan fiction a bit better.

The first time the character of Severus Snape crossed my path was when I went to see the first movie in theater. I was the exact same age as Harry back then. I hadn't read the books before and so far, there only existed four of them. My mother literally forced me to go watch it, for I was expecting it to be nothing but a children's movie. I still remember very vividly how I was sitting there and not really feeling it for that little wizard boy named Harry. The movie went on and Harry entered the Great Hall for the first time and there's the first closeup of Severus Snape, sitting at the teacher's table, side-eyeing Harry while talking to Professor Quirrell. I remember seeing him and falling head over heels. The movie went on and I begged for him to get another minute of screentime. And another one. And another one. The movie ended and I was convinced, there was more to this man than the audience got to see. Naturally, I couldn't wait another year to "meet" Snape again. So, I went home and read all the books. I longed for the movies to get into theatres and for the books to get published. I never cared for Harry, Ron or Hermoine much - I even grew to downright despise Harry from book five onwards. I am not profusely fond of him to this day (although I am a huge fan of the actor Daniel Radcliff). It was all about Snape to me.
I grieved over his death as if I had lost my first love – which he, in a way was. And I cursed J. K. Rowling for letting him fall for such an unworthy woman – to this day, Lily is the enemy to me.

So, my story is the story of what kind of love and desire Severus Snape would have deserved in my opinion and how I see him as a man. This may very likely differ from your perspective so read with caution.

As you start reading you will probably soon be wondering where on the timeline this all takes place. I decided to put it into my own twisted timeline. Therefore, some parts and characters of the original story will get mentioned in my version and others, I will simply cut out and call it artistic freedom. This fan fiction doesn't follow or honour canon strictly – yet I spent hours on Harry Potter wiki to check on schedules, curricula, potions, spells, CVs and architectural constructions of the Hogwarts Castle.
To give you a time reference: Snape in my story is roughly the same age as Snape in the original story. Therefore, my main character Gwendolyn Yaeger would be around the same age as Harry, and they would technically have been classmates. But I decided to cut out the golden Trio and all their classmates completely. In my timeline they magically don't exist, aren't present or just get hinted at, and I gave Gwendolyn a completely different set of side characters.
Yet there are hints about a woman in Snape's past an she is linked to lilies. Also, Voldemort or his Dark Mark on Snape is present and will be referred to as such.

To give myself a little challenge, I tried to reuse quotes from him or addressed at him from the original story and movies and other well known lines for my story. Many of them can mean entirely different things if the surroundings in which they are said are different. Others I had to alter slightly but I tried for them to still be recognizable to the attentive reader. That was really fun to do, and I enjoyed it a great deal. So read carefully and tell me if you found one in the comments.

I want to apologies in advance for my language. I am not a native English speaker, but I decided to write this story in English, because I link Snape's way of speaking directly to the English language. Everything he says gets more impact if he says it in English rather than in German. So sometimes I might struggle a bit.

Also, I sincerely hope this story never reaches anyone linked to J.K. Rowling or Warner Bros. and if through some twisted coincidence it should, please believe me that I never meant to steal anything from your intellectual property or do any harm/cause trouble. I am incredibly thankful for everything you did and wrote. For bringing him to life. I just have to give him an alternative life in which I will not have to part from him, and he gets all the love you could not give him for your storyline.

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