Kim walked around for a moment before finding Porchay. He looked everywhere and he wasn’t surprised to see him like this, grass seemed to always be the place where they shared their thoughts. Always. He felt suddenly really different, way more different than usual. His heart was racing again, and he was feeling worried, embarrassed, he was thinking about the boy’s reaction, about what he would be able to say to make him understand that it wasn’t just a heat, or at least he thought that it wasn’t, but nothing was coming into his mind. Just being worried, just this state and his thoughts running in his mind, thoughts running, Kim smiled shily. Even here, Porchay was the one to make him feel more human than ever.
He approached him but didn’t want to scare him, and he had a crazy idea, it felt like a really weird idea but he still went for this. Quietly and softly he whispered with a tender voice :” Chay…”
The boy turned around and saw Kim, panic could be seen on his face, but he immediately kept his composure and invited him to sit next to him. Kim did, disappointed by his first reflex, disappointed to not have any hint about what those eyes, that first expression meant.
“How…do you feel…about your father?” Porchay asked, smiling at him.
“Why is it…everyone’s question?”
“Because…it’s something that might hurt you and we don’t want you to be hurt…” Porchay said, putting his hand on Kim’s hand, as always, and it gave him more courage, way more, he liked this, it gave him more confidence.
“I don’t feel anything…he is my father like….on papers right? Or officially, but he is still an unknown man…”
“And about…shooting someone?”
“I don’t feel anything at all…I remember I know!” Kim immediately tried to correct himself. “I know that I shouldn’t kill, and I won’t anymore and-”
“Chhhh…” Porchay said, denying with his head. This was what restrained him from getting closer to Kim. The boy was literally giving so much importance to Porchay’s thoughts that he was terrified to influence him too much, he was scared to give him emotions that weren’t real and to turn his own feelings into a deadly weapon. Something Kim would still be dependent on. “P’Kim…you shouldn’t kill as a weapon… as what your father wanted…however you have the time, if you choose to work with your brothers and if you have to kill, you can.”
Kim’s face became horrified at those words. “What…what do you mean? You said that…”
“I said this yes…because you shouldn’t be a weapon but a human who knows what he wants to do. This is why if you want to work for them, I won’t look bad on you or I won’t even be mad, I have no rights on this. P’Kim, you can make decisions for yourself, you are still young for this but you can.”
“I can…I can…” Kim repeated in the void. “How is your leg?” He asked and it was refreshing for Porchay. He felt that they had a usuall and normal conversation.
“It’s great…don’t worry…” Porchay added when Kim’s head showed that he didn’t agree.
“I am sorry…I should have helped you…”
“This isn’t your fault at all…it’s their fault and now they won’t be heard for a moment…”
“Will they kill Ken too?”
YOU ARE READING
The armoured hearts
FanfictionPorsche was the one to put his life in danger to protect his brother and ensure their surviving, until the day he disappeared and Porchay needed to do it himself, his goal being to find his brother, dead or alive. He didn't have the same abilities...
