Hazbin Hotel & Helluva Boss Oneshots

☆Panic Attack- Fizzmodeus

Plot: Fizz has a bad panic attack and Ozzie helps him through it

⚠️TW: Depressing thoughts, panic attacks⚠️

~☆~

It's not enough. It's never enough. 

Work harder, Fizz. You can do more. 

Be better, Fizz. You can be better.

Fizzarolli sits at his vanity, getting ready for his next performance. Mammon had yelled at him for his last one, saying that he knew Fizz could've given more.

"Are you trying to disappoint me?! Am I a joke to you?! Do better, Fizzarolli, or else."

He felt a quick, strong rush of emotion take over him for a split second as he threw his makeup of off the vanity. Tears rushed down his face as he placed his head in his hands.

What more can I do...?

Will it ever be enough...?

He was so tired, physically and mentally. He works himself to his breaking point, so this wasn't an unusual outburst for him. Yet it still scared him when he felt his breathing pick up and tears rolling down his cheeks.

Damnit, it's gonna wash my makeup off! Mammon is gonna kill me!

He tried to stop it, but to no avail. Soon enough, he was curled up into a ball on the floor and attempting to get ahold of his breathing. This time, it wasn't working. He wanted Ozzie. He needed Ozzie. 

~☆~

Asmodeus looked around with concern. Where was Fizz? It was getting close to showtime, and he was nowhere in sight. He decided that it was best to go and look for him, and he was most likely in his dressing room. He walked there and gently knocked on the door.

"Fizz? You in there?" 

At first, he didn't hear anything, but when he listened closely, he finally heard the panicked breathing and the choked back sobs. 

He quickly opened the door, closing it behind him and locking it to make sure nobody came in before rushing over to his boyfriend. 

"Hey, hey, Fizzy, can you hear me?" Fizzarolli nodded and immediately reached his arms out for Ozzie to pull him into his arms. Asmodeus held him close, but not took close to leave Fizz as much room to breathe as he could.

He gently rubbed Fizzarolli's back. "Okay, Fizzy, just like we've been practicing. Listen to my heartbeat and follow my breathing. In and out." It took a minute for Fizz to focus, but he eventually began to do as he was told. 

At first, Fizz couldn't do it, he was reduced to just gasps and wheezes. He was scared, but even this didn't stop the continuous thoughts rushing into his head. 

What if I pass out? What if I miss show time? How will Mammon react?! Shit, shit, shit I'm in so much trouble! Fuck!

Asmodeus' anxiety rose as he saw Fizzarolli's breathing becoming more desperate instead of gradually evening itself out. He felt helpless, like he couldn't do anything. He had a general idea of what caused this attack and what thoughts were currently going through the jester's head, but he couldn't stop it. Mammon wasn't going to let up, and Fizz specifically told Asmodeus to just let it happen. 

He knew Fizz loved performing, it was one of the many things he was good at and enjoyed, but he worked himself too hard and Mammon put too much pressure on him. He was just tired and overwhelmed, but he refused to let Asmodeus step into this part of his life and help him out.

"Fizz, c'mon babe. You can do it. Breathe with me, Fizzy." Asmodeus tried again, nothing changed. "I promise, nobody is going to yell at you for this and nobody is going to be mad if you're a little late. All that matters right now is making sure you're okay. I swear, I won't let Mammon near you right now." That seemed to reassure the boy, and he began to follow Ozzie's breathing. Asmodeus rubbed his back, "there we go, good job, babe."

After a while, Fizzarolli's breathing was close to normal though tears began to stream down his cheeks. He buried his face into Ozzie's chest and held him tightly. 

"I'm sorry..." Fizz muttered.

Ozzie held him close, "don't apologize, Fizz. You have nothing to be sorry for."

"I'm making a big deal over nothing."

"No, you're not. You're stressed, tired, and overwhelmed, I'm not surprised this happened. Honestly, I'm tempted to just take you home and away from Mammon."

Fizz quickly pulled out of the hug, "no! He'll get so mad, and I'll disappoint him and-"

"Fizzy, calm down, you're going to start panicking again." Asmodeus gently placed his hands on either side of Fizzarolli's face and kissed his forehead. "Everything is going to be okay. I know you work hard; I know this is your passion, but is all of this worth it? The stress, the tears, the panic attacks. Is all of it worth it just to appease a man that takes you and all of your talent for granted? I'll support you every step of the way if this is what you truly want, and I will always be here to help you when you need me, but it hurts to see you like this every time something goes wrong. I hate seeing the way he treats you. You deserve so much better than that."

Fizz sighed and leaned against Ozzie's hand, just taking in this moment with his boyfriend. Maybe he was right. Maybe Fizz was working too hard. Maybe all of this wasn't worth the stress. Still, what else would he do? Performing was his life, he loved it so much. 

"If I do quit, how else will I perform. Despite how awful Mammon is and how much stress all of this is, I love what I do."

"You can perform with me, full time. After all, the guests love seeing us on stage together," Asmodeus said, causing Fizz to blush and smile. 

"That sounds nice."

Asmodeus smiled and placed a gentle kiss atop Fizzarolli's head. "Wanna go home?"

Fizz thought for a moment before shaking his head. "No, I can do it. One last show, then I don't ever have to come back here, right?"

Asmodeus placed his forehead against Fizz's, "never again." Fizz giggled and wrapped his arms around Ozzie's neck, pulling him into a loving kiss. "Now, let's get you ready for the final act."

"Thanks, Ozzie. I... I love you."

Asmodeus smiled, "I love you too."