Baby Steps

Halloween

Jo's POV:

After the game Friday, Emma and I had gone home to have a wine night with Nikki and Sam. We all sat around gossiping and telling shit stories, and collectively polished off five bottles of Chardonnay. Oops.

I woke up with a raging headache. Fuck, I hate getting older. 

I pulled myself out of bed to go grab some water, pulling a sweatshirt on. Nikki was already in the kitchen, pecking away at a plain bagel. Felt.

I grabbed the bottle of Advil from out of the drawer and sat down with her, sliding it her way when I was done. 

Eventually we were joined by Sam and Emma, and we were all gathered in the kitchen passing around Advil and gatorade. No one said a word.

Moments like this are why I'm so glad I spent my college career not focused on boys. I was able to make amazing, genuine friends, and with that, amazing, genuine memories. Without boys, I was able to think more clearly and make good decisions. I could protect myself. All things I failed at in high school. That's why I never even considered dating. 

After a long moment of silence, Emma spoke quietly. "There's a Halloween party tonight at the place we went the other week."

Nikki's head perked up. "Oh? That was fun, we should go again."

Sam nodded. "I want to see what all this rage is about."

Still half asleep, I nodded along. Sure, why not another party? What could possibly go wrong?

***

By nighttime, I had managed to pull myself together. I took enough Advil to forget a whole day, and by alternating between napping and showering, I was starting to feel better. 

I had on my costume, and was finishing up hair and makeup. We had decided to all go as superheroes this year, and I was Wonder Woman. I had ordered her classic red and blue bodysuit on Amazon, along with her signature headband, gloves, and cape. I even managed to find a pair of boots like hers. It was a little cheeky, but it was Halloween so I felt a little better. Besides, my ass did look good. 

Emma was going as Cat Woman, Nikki as Green Ivy, and Sam as Batman. They all looked incredible in their costumes. They had come into my room, as I was the last to get ready, and as each one walked in it took my breath away. They absolutely killed it. 

In all honestly, my look wasn't turning out how I envisioned it, and I was feeling a little self-conscious. My makeup wasn't applying well, my hair wasn't sitting nicely, and I was getting frustrated. It looked like it would be one of those days were I just had to suck it up and go out feeling invisible, hoping everyone else will get the memo and stop looking at me too. I hated feeling like this, and I hated that it was happening on Halloween. I didn't want to bring that depression ickiness out with me tonight, dammit. 

After a while I gave up on the hair and makeup, realizing there was nothing I could do that would make me feel better about it. I forced a smile and turned to my friends, grabbing the handle they were passing. Fuck it, let's drink tonight.

When we got to the place, I was feeling it. I had maybe taken it a little too far back at home, as I could feel myself stumbling and giggling as we walked in. Mission accomplished. 

Sam was currently leading me in, and I felt a little bad for him needing to guide me. We got inside, and it was packed. All sorts of wings and horns were poking out all over the place, with a few inflatable costumes worn by frat guys that could be spotted across the crowd. We pushed our way in and towards the kitchen, and I could hear mumbles of "she needs water." Oops.