Nico di Angelo Meets The Batfam (SPOILERS FOR 'THE SUN AND THE STAR'!!)

Nico is Being (unintentionally?) Creepy

This chapter was requested by @NoBrain7 !

Prompt:

Family fluff, like a bunch of times Nico scared them (popping up behind them and that kind of thing), or Alfred's view on some Batfam quality time.

I decided to do like a montage of Nico being the special little creep that we all love, and then add  a little confessional scene where Alfred explains how he feels about the Batfam! I hope you enjoy, my Minions! 

#1: Dick's Pov:

Panic in the Pantry

I hummed happily as I dug through the cabinets in the pantry, searching for the Lucky Charms. i soon found the delicious (and somewhat deadly) cereal and did a little happy dance. Alfred had been going through and removing the super sugary cereal that turned me into 'A brainless and psychotic imbecile'. (Thank you Damian, thank you soooo much. Great, Nico has spread the 'Persassy virus' to me.) I grinned and was about to march out of the pantry, when something cold brushed against my back— I knew it wasn't a shelf since I had been standing in the middle of the pantry, and I hadn't been moving when it touched me— and I jumped at least three feet and screeched— a very manly screech, mind you— and whipped around, ready to bash my attacker's head in with a cereal box, but instead was met by the sight of Nico with a Ō-Ō expression on his face. So I don't think he intended to scare me, but it's possible that my manly screech had just deafened him in one ear, but I don't know, I was to afraid to ask.

#2: Jason's Pov:

Craziness in the Kitchen

I had just finished washing some blood off of my Red Hood helmet in the BatCave, some music playing through the red pair of headphones I was wearing, blocking out any other sound. I smirked triumphantly at the now sparkling clean helmet, that even Alfred would be impressed by. I picked it up from the bench I had been sitting on and got up to go put my guns and gear away. I hummed to the music as I walked through the grandfather clock that was located in Bruce's office, and walked out of it and down the hall. I was going to snatch some of Alfred's famous cookies so I could have a snack while I put my gear away. I walked through the halls, gazing at the occasional picture, painting, and other art of sorts that adorned the ancient walls.

I had soon arrived in the kitchen, and was riffing through the cabinets and cupboards for Alfred's famous cookies. I soon came across the delicacy's, hidden inside of one of the pots. I grinned and pulled the bag the cookies were in, out of the pot. I slowly closed the pot, not wanting to alert any of the Bat-brats that I was raiding the cookies— or Alfred— that would be bad if he found me taking them. I felt bad, but I was only gonna have a few, and who was gonna miss them?

I quickly closed the cabinet, but before it could close all the way, a loud crash made me jump out of my skin. I yelped and dove onto the counter, armed with cookies that could be thrown at a deadly accuracy— Okay, not quite deadly, Alfred didn't let me put any mega sized chocolate chips in them, but hey, you can't blame a guy for trying—, and tossed one at where my attacker was. But instead, I was greeted with the sight of Nico crawling off of the floor, pots and pans scattered around him, a huge hellhound on the table eating a cookie —hey! he stole my cookie- and Tim standing in the doorway, looking like a zombie, face half submerged in his gallon sized jug of coffee. I wasn't sure who was more surprised, but I think it was the hellhound, cause what happened next was total bonkers— and thats coming from me, an actual zombie (If you don't count Tim- or Damian- wow, we've all died a lot.)

Tim spat out his coffee— which had to be at least 1000 degrees Celsius— onto the hellhound. Then things went berserk. The hellhound' s eyes widened, the cookie dropped out of it's mouth, and it let out the most ear splitting, high-pitched sound you had ever heard— yes, even louder than Dick's maniac cackle (trust me, I hate it too)— and as Nico would say, all Hades broke lose.

The dog shadow traveled away, Tim fainted, spilling his lava hot coffee on the floor, Nico tripped on a pan and fell face first into the coffee, which made him screech and leap onto the counter, causing me to fall head first into a pot, passing out— hey, pots hurt, like a lot.

That night I woke up with a bump the size of a goose egg on my forehead, and got scolded by Alfred for trying to steal the cookies, Tim looked dead —he wasn't, unfortunately—, and Bruce looked like he wanted to die. So my mission had partially succeeded— make Bruce miserable, and be an annoying little pain in the butt for him.

#3: Tim

Trouble for Timmy

Okay. I want to keep this short and as least embarrassing for me as possible. Basically, Nico appears out of friken' nowhere, I scream, I spill coffee on Dick. Dick screams, causing the toe-chomping gremlin to rush in with his stabby-stick (Tim-language for sword), and attempt to impale me. Jason came in and stepped in the coffee, slipping and squashing Nico. And I just stood there, and watch as the chaos unfolded, grieving my coffee. 

I'm still grieving, so got bug Damian about stories. I must mourn my caffeine— Oh. Jason just bought me a gallon of coffee and shouted 'Die, Timmy-boi, but do it while doing something you love!' Then idiot #1 ran off to go bother someone else, so I could drink my coffee and die in peace. Timmy, out.

#4 Damian

'Nico can't scare me-,'

Be reasonable. Do you think that imbecile can possibly scare— AHHHHUUUUHHHH! Nico! Get back here this instant, you fiend!

Alfred's opinion on: DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA-DA BATFAM!

"Well, they are a very interesting family. For one... actually, there's just too much chaos— oh. Oh dear. The boys are being chased by— Is that master Nico? No, that's master Damian. He's chasing them with his katana... anyways, they are pretty chaotic, but lovable, and all deserve a second chance— Yes master Tim, even master Damian— no matter what. They can be a little overwhelming at times, but they are a wonderful family. My wonderful family—Master Jason! No, you may not eat thirty cookies" "But Demon dared me to!" "It doesn't matter if master Damian dared you to, put the cookies down! Oh, gosh... I must go now...."

How did you guys like it? And merry Christmas! If you guys would like a Christmas chapter, feel free to ask!

—Anitoly!❤️