In My Head

Going Down ~ Logan

Kaden's breaths come quickly as he huffs for air. He staggers and sways, and I almost grab him, but the dog leaps to her feet. She's at Kaden's side in a split second, rearing up on her hind legs. She nearly knocks him over as she paws his chest.

I jump to place myself between my brother and the dog without even thinking. I glare at the dog.

"Nessa!" Mirie scrambles to her feet and lunges for the dog's collar, yanking her away. Nessa barks: two high-pitched yaps. "What has gotten into you?" she yells down at her dog. She woofs softly.

Something makes me look back at Kaden to see his face going blank. He's going down! I try to reach him, but he tips forward and collapses face-first on the concrete.

I swear and drop to my knees. I reach over and gently push Kaden to his side. Blood oozes from his chin. I can't help but swear again. He got hurt because I didn't catch him! Jake always caught him before he fell. I feel like I completely failed to protect him.

Then I think about how he got hurt on the carpet at the doctor's office. It would be way worse on the concrete. So I jump up lightning quick and sit behind Kaden's back. As gently as I can, I pull on Kaden's shoulder, rolling him to his back. He's stiff.

There's no pillow here, like there was in the doctor's office, so I'll have to be his pillow. I pull him onto my lap, cushioning his head in the crook of my arm, and supporting his upper body on my legs.

Kaden's eyes go wide and stare blankly ahead. He lets out a giant groan as his muscles tense up so hard it forces all the air out of his lungs. Then the shaking starts, and I have to focus hard to keep him up off the driveway without hurting him. His body jerks against me, and I try to make my arm move with him, so it won't hurt him.

Mirie falls to her knees next to me. She makes the most terrified face. She doesn't know he has epilepsy. She probably thinks he's dying.

I grab her hand. "It's okay. He has epilepsy, so this happens all the time."

She stares at him, an odd look on her face. "Okay..."

"Really, he'll stop shaking in a few minutes, and he'll wake up. Don't worry, okay?"

"Okay," she says again.

Kaden trembles so violently he nearly slides out of my arms. I let go of Mirie and scramble to keep Kaden up off the driveway. In this position, he's facing right up at me, and I get a good look at his chin. Blood oozes from the deep gash. Red runs down his jaw, dripping from his neck onto my arm.

Finally, the seizure lets up enough that he starts gasping. Automatic quick inhales and exhales as the muscles force the air in and out. It sounds like he's suffocating. I have to remind myself that he'll be fine once the shaking stops.

The shaking goes down enough that I can loosen my hold. I look at my watch and clench my jaw when I realize I forgot to start my timer. It's 1:03. Suddenly, a cold hand grabs mine. I look down at our hands and then up at Mirie's face. Her face looks paler than normal. She's clearly still worried about him.

I lace my fingers in between hers. "It's okay. It will stop soon, and he'll be fine. Don't worry." My voice wavers just a little.

"Okay. Is this . . . because of basketball?" she asks.

I look down at Kaden lying in my lap, trembling from the brain storm. "I don't know," I mumble, but I do. He started freaking out because of our scrimmage. It caused the seizure.

"It wasn't your fault," Mirie says, touching my shoulder. "You were just having fun. Don't you dare beat yourself up over this!"

I sigh. I can't look at her, so I stare down at Kaden as he seizes in my lap. The shaking has gone down quite a bit now. In the next moment, he stops trembling and starts twitching. "It's stopping," I say.