Samsara of the Divine Punishment

Chapter 32

Chapter XXXII : Death

Mahapdi ang mga matang nagmulat ako. Noong una ay sobrang labo ng paningin ko at sobrang bigat rin ng aking mga talukap. Halos ilang segundo rin ang tumagal bago tuluyang bumalik ang linaw ng paningin ko ngunit nanatili ang hapdi sa mga ito. The first thing that greeted me when I open my eyes is the familiar surroundings of Anamnesis. Lubog parin ang kalahating parte ng katawan ko rito ngunit wala na akong nararamdaman na kung anong bagay ang nakakapit sa mga kamay at paa ko. Nakababa na rin muli ang mga talulot ng bulaklak at malaya ko nang muli nakikita ang kabuuan ng lawa. Mabilis na hinanap ng mata ko si Herno at ang kasama nito sa buong paligid.

"The anamnesis have shown you everything you need from the past," saad ng boses sa aking gilid. Naramdaman ko ang pag angat ng katawan ko paalis sa tubig nang ilipad ako ng babaeng kasama ni Herno paalis sa bulaklak. Maingat ako nitong inilapag sa lupa bago bumalik sa harapan ko kung nasaan ang lumilipad na si Herno.

"It seems like the answers from the past have greatly hurt you, young lady," Herno said with concern in his eyes. Agad na bumaba ang tingin ko sa lupa at kinapa ang kanang pisngi ko. Basa ito at napupuno ng hindi matigil na mga luha. Kaya siguro mahapdi ang mga mata ko dahil sa walang tigil na paglabas rito ng mga luhang hindi ko alam kung kailan pa nagsimulang rumagasa.

"No matter what the Anamnesis have shown you, you shouldn't let it affect your future decisions. The anamnesis only show things that happened in the past that can no longer touch or hurt you." The girl beside Herno said.

But it can. The things that I've seen from the Anamnesis can greatly impact my future. Those things can reach and hurt me because it is unstoppable. But maybe she's also right. The past did scared me, it made me feel hopeless, but the decision is still mine. I have the body that I can control, I have my own mind that can decide what I will do. Sage is not Sonata, he will never be. He may be the incarnation of the sinful God, but as long as he remained as my Sage, my beloved king of Modroust, I will trust him with all my heart.

I need to talk to him and tell him everything.

Alam kong wala nang iba pang makakatulong sa sitwasyon namin kung hindi ang isa't isa. If he knew what's about to happen, I know he'll think of a best solution because that's what he is. Yes, he is far way too better than Sonata.

Nagpasalamat ako sa dalawang fae na si Herno at Mathilda. They escorted me on my way out of their land. Mathilda gave me one last hug and told me not to worry about something that happened long ago.

"Your past can never write your future. You have the pen that can write your version of future so choose what is best for you, the past is merely a memory that is buried within our minds." That's what Mathilda said after bidding her goodbye for me.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit naging mabait sa'kin ang mga fae kung kailan paalis na 'ko. They're kind of aloof when I first stepped my feet on their land but after experiencing the magic of Anamnesis, they suddenly became very comfortable to be with. They became caring as if they all knew what the Anamnesis have shown me and they sympathize with my emotions. It is kind of weird but heartwarming at the same time. It's a feeling of a child waking up from a very traumatic nightmare and found their parent, comforting and telling them that everything is all a dream.

Mabagal ang bawat paghakbang ko sa gitna ng kagubatan. Sa sobrang bagal nito ay hindi man lang ito nakagagawa ng kaunting tunog mula sa mga tuyot na dahon sa lupa. I feel as if my body is made of jell-o, kung hindi ko lang nagagawang kumapit sa bawat punong nalalampasan ko ay baka kanina pa ako natumba sa sobrang panghihina. Tears kept falling from my eyes as if my tear ducts is completely broken. Kahit na anong punas ko sa mga ito, kahit na anong pigil ko rito ay hindi ito mawala wala. Patuloy lamang ito sa pag agos na para bang ito ang mga luha ni Zohana na kailanman ay hindi matatapos.