"HI, MY love. You ready to go?" Finn asks me, and I nod.
Finn and I had both thought seeing Connor and Alya was odd, but neither of us straight up said anything... until I did.
"Okay, is it just me or is Connor really close with Alya?" I ask him, and his face lights up.
"That's exactly what I said! He's taking her out again tonight apparently." He explains. "He's only talked to her like three times and he already seems into her."
Of course he's into her...
Wait, why the fuck do I care?
"Yeah... it's sorta odd." I mumble, and he nods.
"I agree, but I mean, whatever he wants to do." Finn shrugs.
Yeah, but her? Really? She doesn't even look like his type...
"Yeah." I mutter. "Let's just go, yeah?"
He nods once more, grabbing my hand and walking me to his car. I've been thinking about what Amiya said, and it's kinda been driving me crazy. I'm never excited around Finn... that makes me feel awful.
I do like him, I just don't treat him exactly how I treated Connor, and I'm not sure if that's wrong or not.
Connor and I clicked almost immediately, but I made him chase me for a while because I wanted to see if he really wanted me or not, and when he continued to chase, it was obvious that he did want me, and that fact excited me. He was so sweet, and he would do whatever I asked.
Finn would too... so why don't I feel how I did with Connor?
Why am I thinking about my ex while I'm with my boyfriend?! God, I'm so fucked up.
While Finn drives, we don't speak, which only makes my mind keep racing over the thoughts of Connor.
Is he into Alya? Is she into him? Well, she's obviously into him, but I can't help but wonder if he's into her too. She doesn't even seem like his type... why is that all I can think about? His type might have changed.
When we arrive at Finn's house, he helps me out of the car, and he can tell I'm distracted.
"Quinn? What's on your mind? You seem distracted." He whispers, and I snap out of my daze.
"Sorry, I'm just... thinking. I'm good though." I smile softly at him.
"Are you sure? We don't have to hang out." He says softly, and I shake my head.
"No, I wanna hang out, Finny." I say seriously. "Cmon, let's just pick a movie."
He nods, reluctantly sitting down next to me and putting his arm over my shoulder.
I fidget with the small bee charm on my necklace, feeling guilty for thinking about my ex while I'm with Finn. But it's not like I'm still into Connor or something...
Finn soon gets up to get us some snacks, and he tells me to choose whatever movie I want. I choose some silly romcom that I'm pretty sure I made Connor watch with me, but I make the impulsive decision to change it to a different romcom that I've never seen so that the reminders of Connor are minimal.
When Finn comes back, he hands me a small bowl of popcorn and a box of my favorite candy.
"Thank you, Finny. You're the best." I smile, and he smiles back happily.
"Of course, Q." He mumbles, sitting back down next to me and resuming our previous position.
He plays the movie, and I can tell he's not really interested in it, but he's watching it since I really like the movie so far.
When the movie is almost over, Finn gets a text. He removes his arm from my shoulder to text the person back, and I raise an eyebrow.
"Who's that, Finny?" I ask.
"Oh, it's Connor. He was asking if I was gonna be in the tournament this weekend." Finn explains. "I told him yeah. Speaking of, do you wanna go?"
Connor? Of course the universe is taunting me for being a bad girlfriend.
"Oh, uh— will Connor be there?" I ask, and I realize how my words sound. "Not like that! I just— am wondering."
He hesitantly nods. "Yeah. He's gonna be there. Does that impact your answer?"
I shake my head. "No, but you're good if I go? Even though... he'll be there?"
Finn furrows his eyebrows. "Why would I not be okay with that? He's my friend again, and he's bringing Alya anyways."
Alya... right.
"Oh, okay." I reply. "Then yeah, I'll go. I'm pretty sure Connor wanted to introduce me to her anyways."
"He did? That's kinda odd." Finn mutters, and I shrug.
"I sorta thought so too, but I don't really mind. He said we'd probably be friends, so it's whatever." I answer. "It's on Saturday, right?"
"Mhm. I can pick you up?" He offers, and I smile at him.
"Sure, Finny. That'd be wonderful, thank you." I whisper, kissing his cheek softly.
I can't help but pray that nothing goes wrong, because knowing how things have been recently, all hell breaks loose when I'm near connor for more than an hour at a time...
After the movie finishes, Finn asks me if I want to stay over. I would love to, but my parents really want me home tonight.
"I'm so sorry, Finny. My parents want me at home tonight. Maybe soon though, yeah?" I ask, and he smiles, nodding.
"Sure, Q. Whenever you're free." He whispers, walking me to his car and driving me home.
Whenever we reach my house, he walks me to the door like the gentleman he is.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Finny." I mutter before kissing him, and he smiles into the kiss.
"Mhm. See you tomorrow. I love you." He replies.
"I love you too." I answer softly, and his gives me a slightly sad smile.
"No you don't, Quinn. But thank you for trying." He mumbles, kissing my head once before walking back to his car.
I feel awful that I don't love him, because he's perfect. He's an amazing guy and he deserves love, but I just... don't love him like he wants me to. It hurts me so bad that I can't give him what he deserves. I wish I loved him...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
JENNA SPEAKS!
poor finn 😞😞. DW HE GETS AN AMAZING GF IN HIS BOOK!! 🤗.
Is it bad that I'm very excited for the drama that unfolds in the next two chapters?? 👀.
I love writing this fic, and it's crazy that there's only 10 chapters left... wth.
anyways tysm for reading and I love you all so much!!
