Feral : Bellamy Blake

Over Easy

It was the middle of the night and my head still raced.

I had just gotten my father back, I couldn't lose him again. The last time that happened, I did the unforgivable.

But I couldn't leave. This was my new home. After being spat out by the woods clan and only to be accepted back in due to my skills wasn't what I wanted to turn back to. The 100, or at least what is left of the 100 are my family, the people who truly care and the people who I fought beside when times where at their toughest.

But I couldn't leave my father, my blood, my mentor. I was still his little wild flower, he still remembers me from the days that I was gentle and the days that I was broken. He picked up the broken pieces of my heart as they trailed behind me. He was the one that was always there and I knew that if he had any say, he would have come for me.

I had found a quiet place in Abby's medical tent by Hamilton's bedside. After my father's demand, I ran from the tent, feeling the pressure unload on me heavily.

To stay or to leave? I couldn't decide, not in this span of time. My father wanted to leave, Bellamy wanted me to stay.

I couldn't leave Bellamy now, I had just gotten him back, too. I loved him, it wasn't possible for me to just walk away. He kept me going, he showed me that caring didn't mean weakness, he showed me that it was possible to let someone else take care of me for once, that I didn't have to hold myself together every step of the way.

I leaned against the bedside with my forehead rested against my arm, sighing deeply over the situation. I could never choose, not over those two.

I closed my eyes and listened to Hamilton's shallow and steady breaths, the rise and fall of his chest calmed me momentarily.

It suddenly became ragged and the pace quickened. I lifted my head and stood, leaning down over him, looking over his distorted features. "Hamilton?" I whispered.

He stifled a weak cough and winced, his shoulders loosening as he laid there. His eyes rolled beneath their lids as I waited patiently for any further activity.

Finally, the slits of his eyes widened ever so slightly and his crystal blue orbs stared up at me without recognition.

His lips parted to speak but he faced no such luck, only a gravelly squeak escaping his dry mouth.

"Yes, it's me." I smiled, shifting the table so that his torso would be lifted up to a certain angle. "I heard what you did, you were brave."

His eyes fluttered shut and he smiled peacefully, letting out another gentle cough. "The air..." He wheezed. "It burns... my throat..."

"That's called real air, my friend." I chuckled, stepping back. "I'll go get Abby for you."

I pushed out of the tent to be greeted by the sparkling night sky above me. It had been a while since I had been able to settle down and appreciate the nature around me.

It occurred to me that when the sun rose, I would have to make a decision. To leave my father, or my friends and family, especially Bellamy.

There were many ways this could play out, all of them left me with a pounding head ache.

"Abby," I called, catching up to her. "Hamilton's awake."

She nodded sadly, her emotions reflecting how she felt after her daughter left without a word. I didn't want my father to feel that way.

I watched her descend into the tent for a while, but before I could follow after her, a familiar hold grabbed on to my arm from behind.

I turned with my eyes on the ground. "Bellamy..."

"He's your dad, and I'll understand if you choose to go with him." He started. "But I love you and I'm not letting you out of my life again without putting up at least a little bit of a fight."

I kept my gaze glued to the ground. "The decision's hard enough as it is..." I murmured. "Please don't do this to me."

"Cora... I can't lose you again, I just can't."

"I've lost the both of you, how am I supposed to do that again?" I whimpered, pulling my arm out of his grasp and holding myself. "This hurts so much more than it should. This shouldn't even have to be happening."

His jaw tightened as he swallowed and his eyes softened, losing its fight it had moments ago. "I'm sorry." He apologised immediately. "I won't say anything else if you don't want me to." He took a step closer and wrapped his arms around me, his chin rested gently against the top of my head.

I squeezed my eyes shut and rested my body into his, feeling the warmth of his body wrap around me.

What I hadn't seen at the time was my father, Axel, watching Bellamy and I through the tents and people. I hadn't seen his freshly groomed face or his neatly tied hair and beard. I hadn't seen the look on his face that said the words 'I will not break my daughter's heart'.

This book may end a lot sooner than I had arranged so warning :/