alexis
The way my grandmother just openly told this guy that I get nightmares bad enough that I scream really concerns me. According to my mother, staying with her for the summer was supposed to help me, cure me even. But from the looks of it, being here is going to do nothing but make me close myself off even more, and even I didn't think that was possible.
Gram leads me into the main living room, which happened to be my favorite room when I was younger. When I would visit during my spring breaks in elementary school, Gram would make me fresh lemonade and cookies, both of which were homemade. We'd sit in this room for hours chatting about everything, and then finish off the day with some window shopping in town, and maybe even catch a movie. I used to miss even her yellow sofa that was thirty years out of style when I went back home. But now, it just reminds me how far away from home I am.
"Alexis," she starts, shaking her head. This is the point which I tune her out. I'm really not in the mood for a lecture. After only half a day in California, I've already wished countless times that there would be an earthquake big enough to knock down the house and send me home, or at least a better place. But it's not even dark yet and I still have to deal with the rest of the day, not to mention the rest of the summer.
Despite my not participating in the one-sided conversation, I do secretly listen: Gram wants me to make friends with this next door neighbor of hers, whose name apparently is Luke. She thinks he is nice, and she has known him for years and because we are nearly the same age we will make great friends.
Clearly, she has no idea how friendships work.
When I would lie awake at night, attempting to picture myself living here for the summer, I swore that I wouldn't make any friends. There would be no need since I would be returning home at the end of August. Calum was pretty much my only friend back home anyway, so now I had no one. I saw no reason to start bonding with people now, especially not when I would be leaving them in three months.
But, if there's anything I don't want to spend the summer doing, it's sitting in an outdated house with my grandmother eating cookies. If I need to fake a friendship to get myself through the summer, then I might do it. And Luke wasn't bad looking, which was a plus.
He was wearing a shirt advertising a band I liked, so maybe we could bond over that or whatever, talk about normal teenage things. But Calum liked that band, he's the reason I listened to them in the first place.
It seems that everything traces back to him, despite my attempts to not think about him. I've tried to block the memories of him, even the good ones. The good ones are worse than the few bad ones, in a way. They make me long for the days when he was still in my life, during a time after he picked up my pieces and stitched me back together, but a time before he broke me and left me even worse than before.
And this time the damage was irreparable.
Once our little "chat" was over with, it was decided without my input that I would join her and Luke's at their little tea party.
After a stop in the bathroom where I rolled my eyes at my reflection, I walk into the kitchen and see Luke sitting at the bar, a plate of cookies in front of him. Gram is chatting with him, as she flits around the kitchen, doing unnecessary chores as she interrogates Luke about his life. When she sees me in the doorway she smiles, clearly elated that I didn't crawl out the bathroom window and run into traffic.
"Alexis, I'm so glad you decided to join us." I laugh at this, because my presence wasn't in any way my decision. Luke turns around and sort of smiles at me for too long, before turning back to continue his conversation. I think it's about school or something. I sit at the bar next to him but am careful to leave an empty stool between us. I grab a cookie and inspect it carefully. I don't know when the last time I ate was. I don't get hungry much, not since the thing with Calum happened.
They finish their conversation and Gram excuses herself to do a load of laundry. I'm sure she's hoping me and Luke'll take this opportunity to bond and fall in love and have perfect little kids that she can feed cookies and lemonade to.
Fat chance.
"So, what're you doing here? I've never seen you before." Luke asks, turning to me, probably just to be polite. I'm not sure what to say. I doubt he'd want the truth. Everyone tells themselves they do but let's be honest, no one does.
"Um, my parents are going to Europe for a few months and are too cheap to take me, so they dropped me off here. I live near Seattle." I explain, hoping it sounds halfway logical. He nods. I spoke too fast and I wonder if he believes me.
"Aw, that sucks. I've never been to Europe but I've always wanted to go." He attempts to continue the conversation, and I can't remember the last time I've had a normal conversation with another person.
"What accent is that?" I ask him suddenly and instantly regret it. But he definitely isn't from here, and I guess the question is kind of on topic. I think I hear a hint of Australian or something. He laughs and bites down on his black lip ring.
"Australia. I lived in Sydney for a few years and then moved here when I was nine." He tells me. I feel a pang of jealousy. I've always wanted to leave the country, maybe go to England or something.
I open my mouth to say something but then Gram reenters the room, grinning when she sees us making conversation, and not just sitting awkwardly like I predicted.
"Did you kids find something to talk about while I was gone?" She asks, her eyes flicking between the two of us. Luke looks at me and winks,
"You could say that." he says and flashes an award winning smile at me. I turn away.
YOU ARE READING
and then you left // cth
Fanfiction"you left me, cal. after everything you'd said, after every promise, you left me without even saying goodbye," my words knock the wind out of him. he doesn't know what to say, what to do. but even so, he stares into my eyes, reminding me of everythi...
