Deep Regression

Our Little Cliche, Our Void...

Chapter Playlist: Fix You by Coldplay

My lungs burn with a heat that was incomprehensible. I didn't care about the pain right now, all I care is that I can have Peter.
The sound of my feet pounding on the stairs as I climb faster and faster to him. Smelling the painted walls and tasting the sweat going down my forehead. Very serene.
I reach the door that holds Peter behind it, and twitch with anticipation when my hand hits the cold handle.
I'm just going to open the door, storm him, and kiss him with as much passion as I can give. Right, here we go.
I open the door with flying colors and find Peter to be no where.
"Peter?" I yell and get the response I was fearing.
"Oh, ya, harder!" I hear his musky voice through his door.
"Peter, this hurts!"
"Just keep going! I need it!"
He needs it...
I can feel the tears and my heart breaking. He's found someone else, and there's no way I can stay here. My feet jumpstart and I grab my keys from the table. I let a single sob go loud and echo through the apartment. Opening and shutting the door was hard, but it landed with a bang.
Peter...Peter...Peter...
My feet hit the stairs again and I go out the door and run like I haven't seen this new world before. I explode and try to regain my tears through the breaking of my heart, I can't do this, be here, and still live.
Maybe I'll cut myself like Jane, or Hang myself. Then again, old habits die hard, I'll drive the car to the other side of the road and get hit.
Either way, it doesn't matter, I lost my way of life, and there's no way I can get it back without...him. My therapy, my Peter, my...Cliche.
I depend on him, and I don't need him... I'm way beyond need for him. I want him.
I want him in ways that now I can't have him. Now, I'll miss.
I'll miss his voice, thoughts, body that curls up to mine, loving, and his...words. Most of all...I'm going to miss our little cliche. Ya, our Cliche where we shouted into the void that I said wouldn't exist but now I crave to exist. The void where he kissed me and I ran from him like a coward. The. Void.