And In Return...

Fading to Black

Stiles laid in his bed, lifelessly staring up at the ceiling. How did this get so complicated? It was supposed to be business, nothing more. If that was true, why did it seem like a hell of a lot more than a simple deal? Stiles sighed in frustration, turning on his side in hopes of falling asleep. However, he knew that wasn't going to happen because it felt like he'd forgotten something, like his body belonged somewhere else, or belonged to someone else. Knowing where this thought process was headed, Stiles cleared his mind, trying to forget all about Derek Hale.

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The wolf paced, a nauseous smoke evaporating within his stomach. What was he supposed to do now? What could he do? Stiles probably hated him. Of course you don't usually make out, quite intensely, with someone you hate. Maybe he was just confused, like Derek, and didn't know what to do with his emotions. Were they feelings? Hormones? What the hell was happening? Derek knew he wanted Stiles, he had for a long time, but the true meaning of that hadn't sunk in. Did he want to sleep with him, obviously. Did he want an actual relationship, maybe but the thought of rejection burned him. The wolf's heart would be struck deeper than even the singed house he stood in. Perhaps that was it, Stiles didn't want all Derek's emotional baggage- didn't need it either. There was no denying that when you're entire family burns alive, you're bound to have some after-mathematic responses. Maybe Derek was just broken and no matter who he cared for and if they cared for him as well, he'd never be fixed.

Derek wasn't much for sharing his feelings. They really only existed when he spoke to himself- to his own mind. Even that, he didn't enjoy and was thankful when a loud thump interrupted his private therapy session. Once the adrenaline sunk in, he rushed downstairs, following the sound. Okay, Derek thought, that was pretty dumb. Realizing he'd just been lured, the beta revealed his fluorescent blue eyes and claws emerged from his fingertips. However, there wasn't much of a fight when before he could blink, Derek saw only black.

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Fine, Stiles admitted to himself, I suck at forgetting people. In fact, the introspective young man had trouble with not thinking. He tried to calm his mind, tame the wild reveries that continuously rebounded back and forth. Needless to say, it didn't work. DerekDerekDerekDerekDerek, his thoughts nagged, tempting him to relive the past few nights and consider certain things. Stiles didn't want to consider one damn thing, he simply wanted to forget about the "D" word and move on with his life. Rolling his eyes, Stiles knew his carnality mind had millions of other ways to phrase that.

It was early evening and the teenager was unduly horny. Yes, it was common for his gender and age group but this was something else. Without exaggeration, Stiles had to walk up and down his stairs for about an hour to decrease some energy. The boys ADHD already made him extremely active and his craving for someone he didn't dare say wasn't helping at all. Stiles had considered the traditional teenage way of "relieving" oneself, but the thought alone wasn't at all appealing.

"Stiles," his father said from the living room couch, "what exactly are you doing?"

"It's cardio, dad." Stiles replied, continuing to drain his testosterone.

Furrowing his eyebrows, the sheriff shook his head, "Yeah, okay."

For the past day, Stiles had ignored Derek's claim of leaving. It's not like the boy didn't believe him, he had no true reason to stay. That only meant one thing, Derek would probably never come back. Which was a good thing, right? Stiles got his wish, no more blue-eyed beta booty calls. The only trouble was that 'no more' meant never freaking again. Stiles would never see him once he left and something told him that Derek wasn't listed in the phonebook. The teenager wasn't dumb in the least and knew this whole lascivious mind set was probably not a coincidence to Derek leaving. Halting at the top of the stairs, Stiles sat down, deciding that it'd remain that way. Just going to Derek's wouldn't hurt anyone, right? He might have already left and Stiles wouldn't have to decide squat. That only made the boy want to arrive quicker, he had so see Derek- like now. He wouldn't start anything, of course, but no promises were made that he wouldn't finish it.

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