Junkhead

Depression

Nicky jolted up from the bed & yanked Layne's arms off of her, that were tightly wrapped around her.  Sweat continued to ooze out of her pores as she violently tried to take in another breath of air. Tears squeezed out as she clenched her eyes shut.

Layne glanced up at her, slowly sitting up when he noticed the terrified expression scribbled all over her gaunt gray face.  "Nicky?" he whispered to her.  She didn't answer, just sat there like a statue, eyes wide with horror.  Her thin black & red hair was tangled and matted, some of it caught in her eyebrow rings.  Layne reached over and de-tangling the locks from her eyebrow.  He wrapped his arm around her tiny body, concern drenching his thin face.  "Nicky, what's wrong?" He asked her again.

She glanced over at him, blinking.  She shook her head & ran to the restroom door on the other side of the bedroom.  Layne walked over, leaning his head against the door to hear the sounds of dry retching.  He turned the knob & swung it open, his eyes huge when he noticed she was curled over the toilet, two fingers jammed down her throat.  Yellow bile spewed from her mouth & splashed into the toilet bowl, making Layne run over to her and wrap his arms around her.  She shrieked & squirmed in his arms, but she was too weak to break free from him. She wept as he carried her back to the bed and held her tight.

"Why are you doing this Nicky..." Layne muttered.  "Please tell me... Did I do something wrong?  What's going on?"

They had only been at Jerry's house for two days now.  It was a nice place.  2 stories--Layne & Nicky had the top floor & Jerry had the first.  It had 3 bedrooms, 2 of them for the 3 of them to sleep and the other one for storage.  2 full bathrooms with showers, a big eat-in kitchen, and a decent sized living room.  Jerry assumed the both of them would be happy sharing such a nice place, but he had no idea what it was like to be a full on drug addict.  The couple would never be happy...unless they scored.

"Nicky, PLEASE...please just talk to me," Layne continued, holding her tighter.  The heart within his chest dropped when he felt her bones jut into him, his brows now curled in fear.  "You keep losing weight... You never eat, yet I catch you purging?  Please...please just tell me what's going on..."

"74 pounds now," she muttered, turning to see that Layne was glaring back with sorrow in those blue eyes.  She sighed, rolling onto her other side to look at him.  "I'm sorry...  Just had a bad dream, happens every once in a while," she scowled when she tried to swallow, her throat burning.  "Purging calms me down... I would get high but...  Well, you know..."

Layne sat up and reached over to his side of the bed to grab his dentures from his night stand and pop them in.  He turned back to her, studying her figure.  His body shook with anger, having to look away, remembering what Alex, the sociopath from rehab, told him about Nicky. 

She looked like an Ethiopian zombie. 

Alex wasn't over exaggerating.  Layne glanced back at her, keeping his eyes on her turquoise ones, trying his best not to look at the rest of her.  She looked like death.

"What was your dream about?" Layne asked her, wrapping his arms around her again.  Her skin felt like ice.

"I don't wanna talk about it," she muttered.  More tears escaped her eyes, making her roll onto her back & rest the palm of her hand into the deep crook of her ribs.

Layne sighed, sitting back up, glaring at the restroom.  "Was it about your father..."

He heard her weep, making him turn back to her. Tears now stood in his own eyes as he analyzed her wasted body.

"Yes," she moaned, covering her face with her hands.

Layne easily scooped her up from the bed & rested her body along his lap, his hand supporting her head.  "You know, that's done and over with now.  You need to move on," he urged her, wiping her tears away from her face with the sleeve of his sweater.  He sighed as he watched her continue to sob.  "Nicky...  You need to eat.  You look like you're going to die," he continued, his head falling against her flat bony chest. He started crying.  "Please dear god, Nicky, fucking EAT something today...you're scaring me..."